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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 2d

Question: What’s the mistaken possessive equivalent of a greengrocer’s apostrophe?

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 2d

… everyone is going to boycott him by buying the album for the purpose of target practice?

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 5d

But apparently neglecting them until they’re rags is fine and dandy with most of his fanatical followers.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 7d

Got myself back on Weight Watchers. Breakfast this morning is oatmeal inspired by Korean army stew. 9 points of my daily 37. Would have been five but there’s cheese hiding in there.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 7d

My personal favorite is how leading homeopathy brand Oscillococcinum is made: You start with a duck, and dilute it down until all that’s left is a quack.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 8d

Hey, I resemble that remark! I will have you know I made very good money… on second thought, a mediocre sum… actually it was more of a meager pittance doing exactly that kind of writing.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 10d

Vitamin String Quartet strikes again, most likely.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 12d

So far with kaiser rolls recipes, Martha Stewart’s is my favorite. I figured out the surprisingly tricky basics of the old-school folding technique that nobody does anymore. Now to learn how to do it better.

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

Saw a great typo:

No-Kneed Bread.

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

I’m reminded of the old xkcd that had the alt text pointing out a seller on eBay could, for one of every 30 packages, ship a live bobcat in lieu of the item advertised and maintain a 97 percent approval rating.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

He is to restaurants as Max Martin is to pop music; he has figured out the formula to write a massive hit, and isn’t about to deviate from it now or any time soon.

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

Whichever of The Henry, Arrogant Butcher, or Culinary Dropout opened first. Now I’m wondering how many of his concepts have a French dip sandwich.

… I looked. The ones that don’t are Fly Bye, Olive & Ivy, Zinburger, and Blanco. Even Doughbird and Flower Child inexplicably have them.

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

The same waiting a couple of minutes for your table to build anticipation even if the restaurant is completely empty; the same host choreography on the walk to your table where they take four steps, look over their shoulder, and ask how your day is going…

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

The line on the seafood platters “…served with
accoutrements—some raw, some reinvented” has me convinced the menu was created with significant use of ChatGPT with minimal oversight. What human in their right mind would put *those* words in *that* order with THAT fucking em dash?

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

It’s like one night Sam Fox couldn’t decide whether he wanted to go to Houston’s, Zinc Bistro, or some chichi north Scottsdale sports bar, and so he opened a restaurant about it.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

They are definitely kissing cousins. Thousand Island tends to be sweeter from the relish, Russian more piquant from the inclusion of horseradish.

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

TIL… Russian dressing got its name because one of the original ingredients was caviar. The newfangled kind with pickles just ain’t quite the same now.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

So let’s lock him up too.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 14d

I want to pay taxes for things like “people around me not being morons”.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 15d

As usual, their comments aged like a fine guacamole.

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 16d

My minor success this morning: proto-latte art. I’m at a loss for possible alt text to describe my squiggle.

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 16d

What’s it for, the tragic backstory of Emperor Palpatine?

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 17d

That’s like asking a heroin addict if they’ve tried Whip-Its.

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jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 17d

While working on making my perfect breakfast sandwich, I am surprised to find that so far my favorite protein option is turkey bacon. Also the sandwich is dramatically improved by arugula dressed with mayo and a dab of Dijon mustard. Even if the salad component would have me thrown out of New York.

jesterofxanadu.bsky.social @jesterofxanadu.bsky.social · 19d

A nice looking Trump placard flanked by deeply neglected American flags is… a little too à propos for the state of things.

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