Someone much more of a wiseass than me once said, "Death will not release us."

To be honest, I would watch that.

It's absolutely delightful. I'm getting around so quickly today.

Of course you are. I'm T REX (all legs and teeth)

This can't possibly be your first read-through, can it?

In North America at least, a good induction burner is affordable (US$60) and an easy way to try it out. I use mine instead of a range top, including with a raw cast iron pan. The controls are sensitive to cat paws, so I keep it unplugged when not in use.

Me, too.

"You kids better knock it off or you'll never amass unprecedented generational wealth, security, and power! This is why you can't afford vacation homes!"

Oh jeez, yeah

When I was a kid my parents had me put a neon whip flag on my bike's rear wheel for exactly that reason; is this not something parents do any more?

this is where I started screaming DE MORGAN

We've found the alternate history where we're all arachnids