And putting a spotlight on those issues, particularly if journalists start doing pieces on sexual assault allegations in professional sports, could potentially open the door for victims to speak up or for past incidents to be reexamined. I guarantee you that the league is already sweating S2.

This will almost certainly force the real NHL commissioner to put out some kind of statement to condemn those things, or to be silent about it, which would look really, really bad. They'll get a ton of questions and pressure from the press and sponsors they won't be able to dodge. Should be fun!

And then, for some reason, to the final Dance-Off from Girls Just Want to Have Fun: youtu.be/TASGl0_jnjU

If you'd like a journey through Julie's ADHD brain, the above clip then led me to this old-vs.-new faceoff from Xanadu: youtu.be/kCm0_93WCCA

Twin Peaks is so short, and honestly you can bail out after the killer reveal if you want (since it's all downhill from there), so it's a pretty easy watch.

Also, have you watched Yellowjackets? Would definitely rec that over OUAT.

Yep! Ilya is very Eastern European, so he masks most of his feelings with swagger and snark. In the books, you see his internal monologue, how infatuated he is with Shane very early on, how much his family dynamics have trained him to bury his feelings deep and to believe he doesn't deserve love.

I mean, if Connor Storrie can deliver a four page monologue in perfect Russian, I think Charlie Heaton could learn how to pronounce Louisville.

Exactly! I don't understand how the writers could be so tone-deaf about this. I was sort of prepared for something like this, given Millie Bobby Brown's cryptic Emilia-Clarke-like comments about the finale, but it still sucked.

Yikes, sorry, I hope there were adequate spoiler warnings there! And I hope you like it more than I did. I was truly not going in to try to be a grumpypants about it, but it just didn't work for me, at all. I think the whole season would have been better if they'd had a much smaller budget.

In conclusion: I think the only things I liked AT ALL were 1) baseball coach Steve, and 2) Mike's little flash forward to the futures of Lucas and Max, Dustin, and Will. But even those were ruined when they were immediately followed by the Eleven cop-out. So, yeah. Really bad finale. Half a star.

6) I mean, you've really shit the bed when I don't even care anymore if my previous baby angel Steve Harrington lives. I was like, omg, throw him off a cliff already if it will make this terrible, terrible epilogue come to an end. That's true failure, folks. Terrible writing kills all joy.

5) I was already checked out by the time we got to the epilogue, so I'm not sure if anything could have revived me at that point, but omg, did most of those scenes feel weird & forced & flat. Like we'd veered into a very bad 90s teen rom-com that bombed at the box office & had a very cringe ending.

4) I'm really annoyed about the Eleven stuff, and was even more annoyed when they couldn't even commit to what actually happened (in a bad imitation of The Leftovers). And the implication that El would even want to live a life without a single person that she loves and cares about is bizarre. What?

3) The physical Mindflayer battle felt very Starship Troopers to me, except without any of the fun or sense of humor that movie had about itself. It was cut-and-paste from any bad action movie, which is not what I want from Stranger Things. No creativity, no surprises, just boring action tropes.

2) There was so much boring filler in the ep, resulting in truly terrible pacing--just tons of people slowly walking around and delivering really bad dialogue that was aiming for emotional depth but coming across forced and flat and cringey. It was painful to watch them swing and miss so many times.

1) As previously mentioned, it was such a green screened CGI-fest that it felt like a really bad Transformers movie, a complete departure from the very practical-effects driven earlier seasons, which felt so grounded and real. It wasn't driven by story & nostalgia & emotion--it just wasn't itself.

Was it? Cause it kinda felt like a Michael Bay movie.

About which part?

And my thing is, I don't even need super happy, everyone lives for my finales. In my three best list above, people die in all of those! People that I liked! But they were still top-tier finales because they made sense and delivered genuine emotion and honored the legacy of what each show meant.