Stinky

But if you ask those I trusted with my pain
Those I trusted to catch me while in free fall
I’m just throwing sticks and stones

I am now easily spooked just taking out the garbage
I can’t even ride the bus without a panic attack
I locked myself inside and threw away the key.

My body feels like I’m wearing a poorly made suit
I can’t go “home” and feel safe
Places once filled with memories are now filled with ghosts

I was screamed at for weeks for “cheating”
A hole was punched in the wall for “picking someone else”
And I took the blame because it was my fault for being there, even if I didn’t want to

The venom and anger and guilt bubbled to the surface at one time
I could have done a million things but all I did was tell the truth
And apparently, I’m just throwing stones

I bit my tongue for a year before I would even acknowledge it
Drinking myself into a comfortable numb so I wouldn’t have to
All until I was told it was “my drinking problem” that caused it in the first place

That’s all I wanted to say
New comment: “If more people spent time sharing joy over sticks and stones instead of throwing them at each other, the world would be a better place”
Signed - the person who said they’d protect you
Comment liked by: your rapist’s father

Relationships where people take a genuine interest in the other leads to a better result
So if your partner asks you to look at a bird
Take a genuine interest and look at the bird
If your partner finds the perfect stick on a hike
Take a genuine interest and complement the stick

That’s great! Congratulations!

As someone who studied anthropology, this is exactly what I’d suggest. We will find it.

Hope you heal well. For now, rest

Cats, what the internet was actually intended for