What if Gandalf the Grey became Gandalf the White just because it was more flattering for his mature skin

The dentist's office has two different country stations playing in the front and back so I was blessed to hear "Boot Scootin' Boogie" twice this morning

Single ten a.m. hotdog (to the tune of "Tender Tennessee Christmas")

I hope America is as lucky as the delta jet - everyone survives but the right wing explodes

Bad-built Big-Back Billionaire Baby

What's currently missing from the online discourse about idiots trying to rename the Gulf of Mexico is that this move would completely spoil the lyrics of Johnny Horton's "The Battle of New Orleans" and I won't stand for this Johnny Horton's "The Battle of New Orleans" erasure

The only thing I hate about flying is how everyone acts like they're too cool to acknowledge the miracle metal tube that is ferrying us through the skies in ways that our ancestors could have never believed. Please bro it's a miracle tube, no less

Hilarious how Elon has bought his way into the inner circle of US politics but couldn't get a walk-on cameo on the Fallout TV series after showing up to the set

#OOTD inspo 🤘🖤
#ronniejamesdio #

@senatorcyborg.bsky.social called me "Blippi Longtoes" and it's honestly such a read but I can't stop laughing about it

Petitioner: Oh, oracle, what comfort can you bring me in these troubling times?

Oracle: *shows you her phone and it's this screenshot of ZZ Top's Billy Gibbons holding a shrimp po'boy*

You can buy a social media platform AND a US Election, but you can't buy an audience who wants to watch you play guitar