Keen Garrity
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keengarrity.bsky.social
Keen Garrity
@keengarrity.bsky.social
What if Gandalf the Grey became Gandalf the White just because it was more flattering for his mature skin
December 8, 2025 at 3:48 PM
The dentist's office has two different country stations playing in the front and back so I was blessed to hear "Boot Scootin' Boogie" twice this morning
September 3, 2025 at 3:08 PM
Single ten a.m. hotdog (to the tune of "Tender Tennessee Christmas")
July 23, 2025 at 2:18 PM
Reposted by Keen Garrity
I hope America is as lucky as the delta jet - everyone survives but the right wing explodes
February 18, 2025 at 3:49 PM
Bad-built Big-Back Billionaire Baby
February 5, 2025 at 1:33 PM
What's currently missing from the online discourse about idiots trying to rename the Gulf of Mexico is that this move would completely spoil the lyrics of Johnny Horton's "The Battle of New Orleans" and I won't stand for this Johnny Horton's "The Battle of New Orleans" erasure
January 27, 2025 at 6:45 PM
The only thing I hate about flying is how everyone acts like they're too cool to acknowledge the miracle metal tube that is ferrying us through the skies in ways that our ancestors could have never believed. Please bro it's a miracle tube, no less
January 22, 2025 at 4:53 PM
Hilarious how Elon has bought his way into the inner circle of US politics but couldn't get a walk-on cameo on the Fallout TV series after showing up to the set
January 14, 2025 at 12:14 PM
#OOTD inspo 🤘🖤
#ronniejamesdio #
November 20, 2024 at 12:28 PM
@senatorcyborg.bsky.social called me "Blippi Longtoes" and it's honestly such a read but I can't stop laughing about it
November 16, 2024 at 2:41 PM
Petitioner: Oh, oracle, what comfort can you bring me in these troubling times?

Oracle: *shows you her phone and it's this screenshot of ZZ Top's Billy Gibbons holding a shrimp po'boy*
November 14, 2024 at 12:43 PM
You can buy a social media platform AND a US Election, but you can't buy an audience who wants to watch you play guitar
November 13, 2024 at 4:30 PM