is that i might go offline for quite a while and not just deal with irl things but try to "find myself" again without continuing to selfdestruct on every reminder how much of a fuck up i am

maybe ill post here and there still but all together ill be quieting down for good.

guess what it doesnt work because theres not enough disk space >:D

oof sounds about right :p

i mean VR Emulation cant do everything can it? considering the songs were made purely for the machine 🤔

you know reading that reminds me of : "Words can cut like anything else can, but itll hurt more than anything else"

not only allows you to support one another but isnt unfair towards their streamers?

we have lost old twitch features that were useful, we have lost a place to create content without being judged over the smallest things and yet bigger creators get away with some horrible things

Also has there ever been another place that actually let you stream games and dont have you get banned within minutes because the game itself isnt NSFW yet gets flagged as such? or maybe someones vtuber model seems "too lewd" so your entire channel takes a hit? maybe also a stream platform that-

Youtube also has been in not just hotwater but literal magma from AI "moderation" of videos to having an algorythm that doesnt make sense even when trying to understand it (look at difference between YT Shorts and YT Videos themself, Shorts get pushed out MORE than videos themself)

genuinely i didnt expect you to chime in remedy

in the end of things i just have to think things thru and probably keep going in the future but as of currently im likely just staying locked away, be busy and focus on myself until i can do more but, also thanks for what you wrote

honestly breaking would be the worst at this point because i really dont know what i might end up doing

at least its all mostly spontanious thinking of just weeks and weeks of reflecting thats now actually wearing me down (instead of tired tonight im still awake at 2:16am :/ )
but-

Especially after like from days of silence to weeks over to months of silence and shutting myself in that even my one relationship i have feels absolutely pointless with me being a horrible partner (at least being unable to be helpful :p)

at least ive been trying to work on my mental stability

remedy you arent just a rando trust me ^^

but honestly my being lewd online was comfortable but ive also just had somehow a tendency that my head shutoff and made big mistakes that well... resulted in other problems even when always admitting my mistakes 😅

its just that ive hit my breaking point

have a good halloween and please always make sure to take care of those around you, sometimes you never know when they might be gone.