Was at Olive Garden the other day and they gave us a shit ton. I thought “Someone’s not paying their employees enough if they can afford a handful of these for every customer”

“His daily pants-pissing session” is **chef’s kiss

The guy who swims in sewage, has a worm in his brain, dumps bear carcasses in Central Park, and sprays the people riding behind him with the juices of the severed whale head strapped to the top of his car wants you to know that the vaccines you are taking are not as healthy as the poop he swims in.

Old Country Buffet

Mango ice cream?! Where do we get this??