Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1h

Whoops.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 2h

Method acting.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 3h

Those were the good ol' days.

The original Furby was
programmed to let out a
deafening screech if a
child neglected it for
over an hour.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 15h

Yes, libraries were invented before astrological signs. Astrology is not as ancient as most people think. The concept was actually created in 2000 by Al Gore, in an attempt to win over the "crystal girl" demographic during his presidential campaign against George W. Bush.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 16h

Tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Libra Plantable Catnip Seed Card. Studies have shown that Libras are the most forgetful astrological sign. It was actually named so that when someone tells you they're a Libra, it might make them remember to return their overdue library book.
collabs.shop/a4zdeb

A card with a hefty green cat meditating on it. It is balancing two bowls, one with fish and one with meat.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 18h

So sad.

Hershey's was originally
a landmine manufacturer,
but started producing
chocolate instead after founder
Milton Hershey's son was
killed by a landmine in
vietnam.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 19h

My level of tech-savviness falls somewhere between "able to create a Mastodon account, but unable to understand anything anyone on Mastodon is saying".

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 20h

I jokingly posted on Threads about wanting to order a $20,000 pizza that has an autographed Babe Ruth baseball as a topping. It got 32,000 views after the word "order" triggered a ton of bots that flooded the comments asking what I wanted to order. Fun!

A bunch of bots asking what I want to order.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 21h

Wow, I actually never knew this.

Jesus Christ had a
twin brother, but he was
written out of the
Bible for being too
annoying.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 22h

Trump deploys thousands of National Guard troops to Portland but they all just spend the day cautiously circling around Fred Armisen, struggling to properly assess his threat level.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 23h

You know things are getting bad when even whale sharks are anxious. They don't have phones. They can't doomscroll. If they're anxious, then everyone must be.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 23h

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this "I think, therefore I'm anxious" sticker. Descartes has nothing on this whale shark. This updated version of his famous phrase is much more relatable in 2025.
collabs.shop/wfhs6n

A sticker of a happy looking blue whale shark. It says "I think, therefore I am anxious".

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

Obviously.

LIL. Bean
stands for
"Live. Laugh. Bean".

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

I love Bernie Sanders.

"They say
baby got
back, but
where's
baby? can't
find baby."

-Bernie Sanders

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

Medical professionals aren't allowed to have fun like this anymore, because of woke.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

That's understandable.

Zooey Deschanel does not
appear in six episodes of
season five of New Girl
because she was put on
unpaid leave for showing up
to work without bangs.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

Oh, some of you bozos think abolishing ice is political? Sure, and I bet ketchup vs. mustard is somehow a partisan debate too.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

I'm sick and tired of the constant political content on here, so tonight's Low Quality Ad is for this Abolish ICE mug.
Why would a polar bear want to get rid of ice? I don't know. It doesn't make sense to me. I'm just happy to see something apolitical on here for once.
collabs.shop/dvbs17

A white mug with the Icee polar bear on it. It has red and blue stripes and says "Abolish ICE. Keep families together".

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

I'm surprised that so many people don't know this.

Red Bull energy drinks
get their name from the
two ounces of bull blood
found in each can.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

I was criticized for promoting my Patreon. People spent $74.6 million to see the 2019 film Cats in theaters. It would take 34,158 years for Low Quality Facts to bring in as much money. I like to think I provide as much entertainment value as Cats.
Here's my Patreon:
www.patreon.com/lowqualityfa...

Creating Low Quality Facts written in lower quality handwriting.

www.patreon.com

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

Wow, that's crazy.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

Stay healthy, friends.

To prevent eye strain, you
should keep your eyes
less than one inch from
your phone screen at all
times.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

Instead of wasting the time and effort to walk manually, I just ask ChatGPT what to do after my left foot steps forward.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

I would like to clarify that frogs CAN cast magic without a wizard hat, but most frogs refuse to do so because it feels inauthentic.

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Low Quality Facts @lowqualityfacts.bsky.social · 1d

Today's Low Quality Ad is for this Frog Mage blanket. All frogs are capable of casting magic, but sadly most never do because they don't own a wizard hat.
collabs.shop/k1pavo

A blanket with a green frog wearing a wizard hat and robes. He's reading a book, which two toads are sitting on.

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