Matt Goudie
@mattgoudie.bsky.social
An aesthetically sad dad with concave bones. Award-winning screenwriter. Casting Associate for Smyth Casting. He/Him
Pinned
Matt Goudie
@mattgoudie.bsky.social
· Nov 10
I want people to see my work and think it's so good they cry. But like, an ugly cry, y'know?
If Arctic and Antarctic are to respectively mean the place where there are bears and the place where there are no bears we can surmise that the opposite of a bear must be a penguin
December 28, 2025 at 9:45 PM
If Arctic and Antarctic are to respectively mean the place where there are bears and the place where there are no bears we can surmise that the opposite of a bear must be a penguin
Thinking a lot lately about Brennan Lee Mulligan talking about doing pagan rituals with his mom and asking her what the point was if they weren't spiritual and her response of "you only have to believe for the length of the ritual".
December 27, 2025 at 3:04 PM
Thinking a lot lately about Brennan Lee Mulligan talking about doing pagan rituals with his mom and asking her what the point was if they weren't spiritual and her response of "you only have to believe for the length of the ritual".
If you don't have a fireplace you can just play a Christmas yule log video on your TV and Santa will crawl out of it like The Ring
December 25, 2025 at 4:25 AM
If you don't have a fireplace you can just play a Christmas yule log video on your TV and Santa will crawl out of it like The Ring
In the 12 Days of Christmas the narrator famously introduces a new gift every day, but on every subsequent day reiterates the previous gift(s).
Are they simply repeating themselves or are the same gifts compounded as they are again gifted every day? Do they receive 5 golden rings or 35?
Are they simply repeating themselves or are the same gifts compounded as they are again gifted every day? Do they receive 5 golden rings or 35?
December 20, 2025 at 3:55 AM
In the 12 Days of Christmas the narrator famously introduces a new gift every day, but on every subsequent day reiterates the previous gift(s).
Are they simply repeating themselves or are the same gifts compounded as they are again gifted every day? Do they receive 5 golden rings or 35?
Are they simply repeating themselves or are the same gifts compounded as they are again gifted every day? Do they receive 5 golden rings or 35?
Bringing a mistletoe with me to the Christmas party so I can give all my friends tender Lord of the Rings forehead kisses
December 13, 2025 at 5:19 PM
Bringing a mistletoe with me to the Christmas party so I can give all my friends tender Lord of the Rings forehead kisses
Rigby is short for Dirigible
December 10, 2025 at 1:27 PM
Rigby is short for Dirigible
Root beer knuckle tattoo
December 6, 2025 at 11:30 PM
Root beer knuckle tattoo
Is this something?
November 21, 2025 at 8:17 PM
Is this something?
Last night I had a dream I had a business meeting with Seth Rogen and he got really enamoured with me and told me I had the spirit of a poet
November 4, 2025 at 2:15 PM
Last night I had a dream I had a business meeting with Seth Rogen and he got really enamoured with me and told me I had the spirit of a poet
Listen I know HE's not Frankenstein, he's Frankenstein's Monster, but then why is SHE the Bride of Frankenstein?
October 28, 2025 at 8:53 PM
Listen I know HE's not Frankenstein, he's Frankenstein's Monster, but then why is SHE the Bride of Frankenstein?
My drag queen name would be Luxating Patella
October 25, 2025 at 4:44 PM
My drag queen name would be Luxating Patella
I'm going to be the first person to fly to the moon and write upon its surface the words "COCA COLA™️"
October 6, 2025 at 10:57 PM
I'm going to be the first person to fly to the moon and write upon its surface the words "COCA COLA™️"
Reposted by Matt Goudie
October 3, 2025 at 9:30 AM
Do you think someone with four arms would have an easier time patting their head and rubbing their belly
September 9, 2025 at 5:29 PM
Do you think someone with four arms would have an easier time patting their head and rubbing their belly
My gender is
❎ Male
❎ Female
❎ Non-binary
✅ 𝘔𝘢𝘮𝘢 by My Chemical Romance
❎ Male
❎ Female
❎ Non-binary
✅ 𝘔𝘢𝘮𝘢 by My Chemical Romance
August 25, 2025 at 6:13 PM
My gender is
❎ Male
❎ Female
❎ Non-binary
✅ 𝘔𝘢𝘮𝘢 by My Chemical Romance
❎ Male
❎ Female
❎ Non-binary
✅ 𝘔𝘢𝘮𝘢 by My Chemical Romance
Do people that order drinks with bitters also chew their Tylenol
August 25, 2025 at 3:08 AM
Do people that order drinks with bitters also chew their Tylenol
Gay Bowser implies the existence of Straight Waluigi
August 4, 2025 at 1:42 AM
Gay Bowser implies the existence of Straight Waluigi
I just finished my first book on a Kindle and it doesn't tell you at the end how fast you read the book despite knowing the average time it takes to read the book which defeats the whole purpose of reading the book, which is to win
August 3, 2025 at 3:10 PM
I just finished my first book on a Kindle and it doesn't tell you at the end how fast you read the book despite knowing the average time it takes to read the book which defeats the whole purpose of reading the book, which is to win
Last night I dreamt I was on an episode of Game Changer which culminated in a fan vote between me and Ben Schwartz and I had to plead to the camera to let me win because I knew I would never be as funny or likeable as Ben Schwartz
July 30, 2025 at 1:57 PM
Last night I dreamt I was on an episode of Game Changer which culminated in a fan vote between me and Ben Schwartz and I had to plead to the camera to let me win because I knew I would never be as funny or likeable as Ben Schwartz
The government doesn't want you to know that the America's Funniest Home Videos theme is ska
July 23, 2025 at 1:55 PM
The government doesn't want you to know that the America's Funniest Home Videos theme is ska
Made spaghetti yesterday but forgot we were out of parmesan. Turns out spaghetti isn't my favourite meal I just really like cheese
July 20, 2025 at 7:26 PM
Made spaghetti yesterday but forgot we were out of parmesan. Turns out spaghetti isn't my favourite meal I just really like cheese
Remi Wolf can never collab with Rick Springfield because he's a working class dog and she's allergic
July 19, 2025 at 4:05 AM
Remi Wolf can never collab with Rick Springfield because he's a working class dog and she's allergic
Crazy in this day and age that I can Uber basically anything to my door but I can't call the ice cream truck to swing by my neighbourhood
June 29, 2025 at 8:57 PM
Crazy in this day and age that I can Uber basically anything to my door but I can't call the ice cream truck to swing by my neighbourhood
Reposted by Matt Goudie
Has it really been TEN YEARS of Pale Horses?????
#mewithoutYouForever
#mewithoutYouForever
June 16, 2025 at 2:30 PM
Has it really been TEN YEARS of Pale Horses?????
#mewithoutYouForever
#mewithoutYouForever
Chubby Bunny but with hot dogs
June 15, 2025 at 4:26 PM
Chubby Bunny but with hot dogs