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mattnightingale.bsky.social
Matt Nightingale
@mattnightingale.bsky.social
3.8K followers 1.1K following 1.2K posts
Alejandro’s husband. Co-pastor of @wearethequest.bsky.social. Founder of @commonsanctuary.bsky.social. Spiritual director. TED talker. All Christian, all gay, all the time. #FaithfullyLGBT #BLM He/him
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mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read "Patient Trust" by Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, SJ. Thank you to
@thelepper.bsky.social for choosing the song and text, and for reading so beautifully for us tonight. 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
Above all, trust in the slow work of God. We are quite naturally impatient in everything to reach the end without delay. We should like to skip the intermediate stages. We are impatient of being on the way to something unknown, something new And yet it is the law of all progress that it is made by passing through some stages of instability and that it may take a very long time And so I think it is with you; your ideas mature gradually-let them grow, let them shape themselves, without undue haste. Don't try to force them on, as though you could be today what time (that is to say, grace and circumstances acting on your own good will) will make of you tomorrow. Only God could say what this new spirit gradually forming within you will be. Give Our Lord the benefit of believing that his hand is leading you, and accept the anxiety of feeling yourself in suspense and incomplete. Above all, trust in the slow work of God our loving vine dresser.
November 11, 2025 at 3:48 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read a selection from Frederick Buechner's "Now and Then." Thank you to
@terranen.bsky.social for selecting the song and text, creating the graphic, and reading so beautifully for us tonight. 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery that it is. In the boredom and pain of it no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it because in the last analysis all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace.
November 4, 2025 at 6:01 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read "The Song of the Bird" by Anthony De Mello. Thank you to @jjr222.bsky.social for choosing the song and the text, and for reading so beautifully for us tonight. 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
The disciples were full of questions about God. Said the master, "God is the Unknown and the Unknowable. Every statement about him, every answer to your questions, is a distortion of the truth." The disciples were bewildered. "Then why do you speak about him at all?" "Why does the bird sing?" said the master. Not because it has a statement, but because it has a song. The words of the scholar are to be understood. The words of the scholar are not to be understood. They are to be listened to as one listens to the wind in the trees and the sound of the river and the song of the bird. They will awaken something within the heart that is beyond all knowledge.
October 28, 2025 at 2:56 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read
@notquitehydepark.bsky.social's "Prayer for Werewolves." Thank you to our friend Bryan for choosing the song and the text, and for reading so beautifully for us tonight. 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
Someone will probably love you for who you are. If not, you'll still find friends, friends who, given time, or given warning, will probably gather around you, hold your hands, and wrap you in soft coats and blankets till the violence inside your body ends. Someone will probably love you for who you are, not just for who you labor to be. Maybe you're lost in your skin today. Maybe you're burning and wish you could tear it all off. Please don't. You are variously a marvel, an athlete, a wilderness, a source of warmth and a way to learn from fear. When you have claws, your claws are yours, your ears bristle and are yours; your irises are citrine, pure, and yours. They let you see through smog and pine thickets and into the future, where you need no chains to feel secure, and someone will probably love you for who you are: then you will know each other's scents and nuzzle or lope together. But for now, you have friends, who are not going anywhere. Please stay here.
October 21, 2025 at 5:12 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
Actually, Sophie B. shared that one time last year! SO gorgeous! Maybe you missed that one...
October 21, 2025 at 5:08 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read Mary's Magnificat, Luke 1:46-55 (NRSVUE), with the reminder that when the writers of the Bible talk about "Israel," they're not talking about the modern nation-state of Israel.
And Mary said, "My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has looked with favor on the lowly state of his servant. Surely from now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me, and holy is his name; indeed, his mercy is for those who revere him from generation to generation. He has shown strength with his arm; he has scattered the proud in the imagination of their hearts. He has brought down the powerful from their thrones and lifted up the lowly; he has filled the hungry with good things and sent the rich away empty. He has come to the aid of his child Israel, in remembrance of his mercy, according to the promise he made to our ancestors, to Abraham and to his descendants forever."
October 7, 2025 at 6:55 PM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read @razorfemme.bsky.social's "trauma is not sacred." Thank you to @jennadewitt.bsky.social for choosing the song and the text, creating the graphic, and for reading so beautifully for us tonight. 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
violence is not special pain is not holy suffering does not make angels abuse defines no one you are more than the things that hurt you you are more than the people you have hurt do not make an altar to your woundedness do not make a fetish out of mine a body belongs to no one a memory is not made to be eaten does it titillate you to hear about assault if i told you my story, would you swallow it whole if i confessed my sins would you feed me to the beasts to purge your own i will show you mine if you show me yours we have all seen the darkness now give us the dawn tell me about the joy you keep in the hollow spaces between your bones tell me again how you laughed when you realized that you were not wholly unlovable i'll tell you again how i cried when my best friend told me that I was not a bad person remember how we used to count the lines on our palms when we were little how we used to try to read the future for its gifts how we used to make lists of the things we would dream of when finally we were free i will make you a list of the things i'm grateful for i will sing you a litany of reasons to be alive i want to know the songs you wake up for in the morning i want to marvel at the unbelievable graciousness of your being i know that i am capable of pouring love like lavender oil into your cupped palms there is forgiveness like honey pooled in the chambers of our hearts you are the thing i am most grateful for all bodies know how to heal themselves given enough time all demons carry a map of heaven and their scars beneath the skin of every history of trauma there is a love poem waiting deep below
September 30, 2025 at 3:10 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read an excerpt from Fr. Greg Boyle's book "Cherished Belonging: The Healing Power of Love in Divided Times." Thank you to @claytongladish.bsky.social for choosing the song and text, creating the graphic, and for reading so beautifully for us tonight.
If our God makes us feel unworthy: wrong God. If God frightens us: wrong God. If God is endlessly disappointed in us: wrong God. A man I knew after being fired from his job said, "It's a good thing I believe in a God who says vengeance will be mine." Uh oh: wrong God. If a homie sends me a cell photo of his car, completely totaled, but there's not a scratch on him or his wife and kids, then he writes "God is unbelievable!" and, indeed, God is. But if his kids had died in that accident, what would we be forced to say about God? The tender one is unbelievable in lots of ways that don't occur to us. God roots for us more than calls shots. With tenderness as the scaffolding, we cease trying to change God's mind and allow God to marinate ours. This God says, "You got this," more than "do that."
September 16, 2025 at 2:53 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read Broken? by Carol Krause. Thank you to our friend Lolly for choosing the song and text, and for reading so beautifully for us tonight. 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
They will tell you there is something wrong with you. They will be right. There is something wrong with you. How else could you have learned to listen? If you didn't have something misplaced, why would you ever need to yearn for the boundless? If you had not broken open, why would you ever have to wail? This very brokenness has brought you to your knees. Which is what we were waiting for. The moment when you would no longer have enough of this world to satisty you. The moment when you would long for something that is not of this world. And you would cry out, for mercy, for peace. We will show you how we enter the places that are hurting. Whispering into your heart, my dear, my dear. We do not put you back together again, not this time. Because there are no back and forwards anymore. It's better we don't change a thing. That way, when you cry out, your cries will contain everything.
September 9, 2025 at 5:11 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And we San Franciscans were lucky enough to have the fabulous @flamygrant.bsky.social open the show! It was an amazing evening, and I’m so grateful I got to experience it with my husband Alejandro, and dear friends @wholeheartedmindy.bsky.social & Lyndon Braun.
September 7, 2025 at 7:29 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And it’s been especially meaningful to see him become such a fierce ally of the LGBTQ+ community in the last several years. Tonight he played through his latest record, “Survival Songs,” a love letter to his own queer kid and to all queer kids everywhere.
September 7, 2025 at 7:29 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
It was a powerful evening of storytelling and music tonight with
@derekwwebb.bsky.social in San Francisco. I’ve been following along as he describes the world as he sees it for more than three decades now...
September 7, 2025 at 7:29 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And for our lectio divina practice, we read two poems by Emily Dickinson. Thank you to @joremmons.bsky.social for choosing our song and text tonight, and to our friend @jjr222.bsky.social for reading so beautifully for us.
I shall know why-when Time is over— And I have ceased to wonder why— Christ will explain each separate anguish In the fair schoolroom of the sky— He will tell me what "Peter" promised— And I-for wonder at his woe— I shall forget the drop of Anguish That scalds me now—that scalds me now! This World is not Conclusion. A Species stands beyond — Invisible, as Music — But positive, as Sound — It beckons, and it baffles — Philosophy — don't know — And through a Riddle, at the last — Sagacity, must go — To guess it, puzzles scholars — To gain it, Men have borne Contempt of Generations And Crucifixion, shown — Faith slips - and laughs, and rallies — Blushes, if any see — Plucks at a twig of Evidence - And asks a Vane, the way — Much Gesture, from the Pulpit — Strong Hallelujahs roll — Narcotics cannot still the Tooth That nibbles at the soul —
September 2, 2025 at 3:13 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
We lit our new Marsha P. Johnson prayer candle (check out Jason Tseng's Queer Saints project on Instagram: instagram.com/queersaints/), and then we had our opening meditation, listening agreements and check ins.
Photo of a lit Marsha P. Johnson prayer candle
September 2, 2025 at 3:13 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read Meister Eckhart's "When I Was the Forest." Thank you to Lolly for choosing the song and reading, and to @wholeheartedmindy.bsky.social for reading so beautifully for us tonight.
When I was the stream, when I was the forest, when I was still the field when I was every hoof, foot, fin and wing, when I was the sky itself, no one ever asked me did I have a purpose, no one ever wondered was there anything I might need, for there was nothing I could not love It was when I left all we once were that the agony began, the fear and questions came, and I wept, | wept. And tears I had never known before. So l returned to the river, I returned to the mountains. I asked for their hand in marriage again, I begged — I begged to wed every object and creature, and when they accepted, God was ever present in my arms. And He did not say, "Where have you been?" For then I knew my soul every soul — has always held Him.
August 26, 2025 at 5:21 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read
@jayhulmepoet.bsky.social's "Seeking Trans Ancestors in Old Provincial Graveyards." Thank you to our friend Peter for choosing the song and text, and for reading so beautifully for us tonight. 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
The dead are calling out again; I heard their names the other day, rarely spoken beyond the edge of the graveyard - Unconsecrated ground cannot hold them for long. There are names and names and empty syllables until the day break'. Every day breaks like a man, and every night falls like a woman, and the dawn arises and the moon in the daytime hangs silent and awkward, like the rest who've never belonged. And they hang pride flags outside the churches now, and the homophobes claim it's God's rainbow, and the queers claim it's our rainbow, and God claims all of us anyway, long before we are born. In the wind I hear the names again. Their echoes are all the syllables we've never quite said. Dead. Undead. Dead. Undead. Dead. Undead. Until the day break I walk the church line, drag my feet over endless graves, speak the names. All these empty names. Those too weathered to read, I speak loudest of all. A response call. Joshua. Edward. Mary. Beloved of her family. Born. Lived. Died. A date. A promise. A fall.
August 19, 2025 at 5:06 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
Perhaps because they don’t want to leave a public comment and out themselves, my anonymous friend is now sending follow-up messages through my website. Yes, I’m aware of the clobber passages. I’ve studied them for years.
A message Matt received through his website. It reads: Old Testament: Leviticus 18:22 Leviticus 20:13 Genesis 19:4-5 Deuteronomy 23:17-18 Genesis 9:13-16 New Testament: Romans 1:26-27 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 1 Timothy 1:9-10 It's all in the Bible. The word for God matt. Also you block everyone that disagrees with you, you false coward and man or the devil Homosexuality is sin..the Bible is clear on this
August 18, 2025 at 12:02 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
If you’re going to take the time to confront me as a so-called “false pastor,” I wish you’d also have the courage to leave your real name and contact information. But since “[email protected]” isn’t a working e-mail address, I can’t respond privately. 🧵
Screenshot of a message I received through my website. They entered an obviously fake name ("Bible Reader") and email address ("readyour@bible.com") and then left this message: "Sinful false pastor Matt. This is just a reminder again that you are a sinful person who refuses to read the Bible or scripture that Jesus himself told his followers to read and follow. Your sexual perversion is in the Bible. It's a sin. And you can lie all you want. You will burn in hell for it, that's the word of God. The issue is the amount of people you are taking with you. Your sin is an abomination. It is clearly written."
August 17, 2025 at 12:53 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read an excerpt from Gregory of Nyssa's "The Life of Moses."
When Moses rose higher and became more perfect, he saw God in the cloud. He who is purified in mind who rises above all created things, and who forsakes all that is visible, enters into the secret darkness of the knowledge of God. There, beyond the reach of the intellect, he draws near to what is invisible and incomprehensible, and he belongs entirely to Him who is beyond all things: This is the true knowledge of what is sought. to see that it is invisible, and to understand that it cannot be understood. For the more the soul ascends, the more it realizes the limitless nature of the Divine: In this way, love itself is fed by the soul's longing, and its hunger is not diminished by satisfaction. The more it discovers, the more it seeks, and the more it seeks, the more it finds — yet what it finds is beyond what can be grasped. Thus the soul's journey is without limit. Leaving behind every measure of what has been attained, it stretches forward toward what lies beyond. Each new vision kindles a greater desire, and this desire leads to a vision yet more sublime, drawing the soul ever onward into the depth of the divine mystery. So it is that the soul presses forward, always reaching beyond itself into the mystery, finding God not in the light of human certainty, but in the dazzling darkness where He dwells.
August 12, 2025 at 5:59 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read John 15:9-17 (NIV). Thank you to @ace-reporter1.bsky.social for choosing the song and the text, and for reading so beautifully for us tonight. 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as l have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you. This is my command: Love each other."
August 5, 2025 at 6:53 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
Only one spot left! We start next Thursday. Join us? 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈
YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS ALONE Queer Men's Mixed-Orientation Marriage Support Group Sacred space for connection, storytelling, and healing. Thursdays, August 7 - November 13 5:30-7:00pm PT / 8:30-10:00pm ET • Initial 8-week storytelling group • Optional 7-week reflection group • Two 1:1 sessions with Matt per group $500 per group or $850 for both if paid upfront. Scholarships available. Register at commonsanctuary.org.
August 1, 2025 at 8:29 PM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
We still have room! This is a really powerful experience for guys in this situation. Reach out if you or someone you know needs this kind of structured support right now. Don't let the cost keep you away. Scholarships are available. Talk to me.
July 29, 2025 at 3:43 PM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read Walter Wangerin's poetic rendering of Psalm 23. Thank you to
@salthenurse08.bsky.social for choosing the song and text, and for reading so beautifully for us tonight. 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
I am not lonely. God is here. Hand at my shoulder. Word in my ear. The Lord is the shepherd who leads me down To quiet pools and a soft green ground. He feeds, restores, beholds, relieves me, Shows the right road, then precedes me. I am not lonely. God is here. Strength for my going. Song in my ear. Yea, though I cross the valley of dying, I do not fear. I am not crying. Thy rod for the beast, thy staff for my leaning, Thou art my comfort and thou my redeeming. Thou art my present, beginning and ending, The oil that I feel on my forehead descending, The goodness that follows my every endeavor, The temple I'll dwell in forever and ever- O lord, I am not lonely now, For thou art with me, my shepherd-thou!
July 29, 2025 at 5:10 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
And then for our lectio divina practice, we read Luke 10:25-37 from the NRSVUE. Thank you to @audnebula.bsky.social for choosing the song and the text, and for reading so beautifully for us tonight. 🙏🏼❤️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
An expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. "Teacher," he said, "what must I do to inherit eternal life?" He said to him, "What is written in the law? What do you read there?" He answered, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind and your neighbor as yourself." And he said to him, "You have given the right answer; do this, and you will live." But wanting to vindicate himself, he asked Jesus, "And who is my neighbor?" Jesus replied, "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho and fell into the hands of robbers, who stripped him, beat him, and took off, leaving him half dead. Now by chance a priest was going down that road, and when he saw him he passed by on the other side. So likewise a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan while traveling came upon him, and when he saw him he was moved with compassion. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, treating them with oil and wine. Then he put him on his own animal, brought him to an inn, and took care of him. The next day he took out two denarii, gave them to the innkeeper, and said, 'Take care of him, and when I come back I will repay you whatever more you spend.' Which of these three, do you think, was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of the robbers?" He said, "The one who showed him mercy." Jesus said to him, "Go and do likewise."
July 22, 2025 at 3:10 AM
mattnightingale.bsky.social
I'm excited to launch my newest support group for queer men in mixed-orientation marriages. The first group runs for 8 weeks, Thursday nights from August 7-September 25, and then the second group (optional, but highly recommended) continues from October 2-November 13.
YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS ALONE Queer Men's Mixed-Orientation Marriage Support Group Sacred space for connection, storytelling, and healing. Thursdays, August 7 - November 13 5:30-7:00pm PT / 8:30-10:00pm ET • Initial 8-week storytelling group • Optional 7-week reflection group • Two 1:1 sessions with Matt per group $500 per group or $850 for both if paid upfront. Scholarships available. Register at commonsanctuary.org.
July 15, 2025 at 6:38 PM