Churchy LaRoux
@mctavandish.bsky.social
Listen, I'm not some big city lawyer.
I dated a girl in high school that my friends called Hamlet. Because she always wore pink and looked like a little pig.
February 17, 2026 at 1:17 AM
I dated a girl in high school that my friends called Hamlet. Because she always wore pink and looked like a little pig.
Isn't it better to have the pedophiles on an island rather than living among us? Really, Epstein was kind of a hero, when you think about it.
February 17, 2026 at 1:12 AM
Isn't it better to have the pedophiles on an island rather than living among us? Really, Epstein was kind of a hero, when you think about it.
Brother, I feel that. I'm so in touch with the common man it's starting to rub off on me.
February 17, 2026 at 12:49 AM
Brother, I feel that. I'm so in touch with the common man it's starting to rub off on me.
Even as a Seahawks fan I don't want this. Sending Tua to the NFC West would be torture porn. What's the under on divisional matches before he's medically retired?
February 16, 2026 at 7:22 PM
Even as a Seahawks fan I don't want this. Sending Tua to the NFC West would be torture porn. What's the under on divisional matches before he's medically retired?
You know what's REALLY invasive? The English. Those fuckers got everywhere.
February 15, 2026 at 6:40 PM
You know what's REALLY invasive? The English. Those fuckers got everywhere.
Good for you. Frankly, toupee-shaming had gotten out of hand. Stand tall, King.
February 12, 2026 at 3:29 PM
Good for you. Frankly, toupee-shaming had gotten out of hand. Stand tall, King.
At the very least, they wouldn't have anyone to read them well enough to redact them
February 11, 2026 at 4:18 AM
At the very least, they wouldn't have anyone to read them well enough to redact them
This flyer makes it look like Amazon is sponsoring a Dump Ice rally.
February 11, 2026 at 1:41 AM
This flyer makes it look like Amazon is sponsoring a Dump Ice rally.
I 100% thought this was someone breaking ranks over the Epstein files
February 11, 2026 at 1:32 AM
I 100% thought this was someone breaking ranks over the Epstein files
If I want to Plant Flax I'll just show off pictures of my tomatoes
February 10, 2026 at 6:52 PM
If I want to Plant Flax I'll just show off pictures of my tomatoes
IT'S A FEATURE, NOT A BUG!
February 10, 2026 at 6:49 PM
IT'S A FEATURE, NOT A BUG!
It's cool that The Onion is getting into sports
February 10, 2026 at 3:02 PM
It's cool that The Onion is getting into sports
Mina's analysis is spot-on. Except for her Geno take. Never forget. ✌️
February 10, 2026 at 12:30 AM
Mina's analysis is spot-on. Except for her Geno take. Never forget. ✌️
This AND the Bake-Off? You're like a Make-A-Wish kid. But, you know, without the other stuff.
February 9, 2026 at 10:46 PM
This AND the Bake-Off? You're like a Make-A-Wish kid. But, you know, without the other stuff.
And a healthy Tory Horton?
February 9, 2026 at 5:55 AM
And a healthy Tory Horton?
I promise you, we are going to BURY teams next year. The season won't be about reaching the Superbowl, it'll be about reaching football perfection.
February 9, 2026 at 4:56 AM
I promise you, we are going to BURY teams next year. The season won't be about reaching the Superbowl, it'll be about reaching football perfection.
They were in our house. Watching the Seahawks as a Seahawks fan hurts.
February 9, 2026 at 4:34 AM
They were in our house. Watching the Seahawks as a Seahawks fan hurts.
He just inspired me to dye my beard
February 9, 2026 at 1:31 AM
He just inspired me to dye my beard
We got him in the fifth BECAUSE of that ACL. Which honestly seems like robbery given his measurables
February 9, 2026 at 1:18 AM
We got him in the fifth BECAUSE of that ACL. Which honestly seems like robbery given his measurables
Should of used the FishEye
February 8, 2026 at 6:00 PM
Should of used the FishEye
Solid hate-posting right here
February 8, 2026 at 4:50 AM
Solid hate-posting right here