New Pope just dropped.

Nothing like tripping a middle-schooler and hearing him scream “Ahhh! My vape!” as he hits the ground.

A Weird Al parody of Come on Aileen but it’s Come on a Lien? about a guy who can’t pay his mortgage.

Had the neighbor ask if they could borrow two eggs. Turned into a negotiation that felt like I was Gastown trying to make a deal with the Bullet Farm.

This TikTok app sounds interesting. Thinking of downloading it but I have heard much about it.

My 5-year old just asked me “How are giraffes real but unicorns aren’t?” And I honestly didn’t have a good answer.

Just finished this on @netflix.com Great holiday popcorn thriller. I’m down for this becoming a new Die Hard-esque franchise. Make it happen!

Everyone is saying Nosferatu this and Nosferatu that but no one has the courage to say Yesferatu.

Now watching: Mixed Nuts (1994)

How I think I look when I’m drunk vs. how I actually look.

All I want in life is one room in an old house to call my own while my artist wife and her gay bff remodel the rest and my goth daughter befriends the ghosts of the previous owners, who died in an automobile accident. Is that too much to ask?

Taking down my reclaimed barn wood “Live, Laugh, Love” signs and replacing them with charred wood “Deny, Defend, Depose” signs.