I dunno. I’m just venting. Not expecting a response or anything. I hope a year from now I can look at this and feel I’ve come far. I’ve escaped that feeling. I have hope. I have faith in myself and my abilities. I am a healer. But I need healing too. I matter too…

If I’m not 100% happy and energetic everyday all day, I’m the problem. This is how it’s always been. And sometimes I don’t give a fuck and I stand on business with my emotions. And then times like this when I don’t have that energy. I don’t wanna have to advocate for my right to be human.

I am tired. I don’t know what other word to use. I feel like my level of vocabulary doesn’t throughly express how I’m feeling. I’m more than empty. I’m more than miserable. I just want to sleep until I am free from this. 😮‍💨 I continue to try. But for what. For what?!

I try to find joy in every day. I laugh at my babies playing and being goofy. I try to make their little lives to damn good and happy. And I make sure to be the best friend and girlfriend I possibly can be. And I don’t get .5% of that in return, it feels.

I keep telling myself I’m just crazy and emotional and dramatic and I need to just get over it. But the meditating and deep breathing isn’t helping shit. I have to lock myself in my bedroom everyday because I don’t feel safe in this house. I am beyond miserable.

I’m so tired of taking one step of progress and not even getting to celebrate that little win before I am spartan kicked 1000000000 steps back. And I keep getting up and going. I’m tired. I’m so fucking tired. I want a little peace. Just a little. I don’t even know what that is.

I have spend over a decade advocating for myself, being discriminated against and consistently made felt like my ailments were surpassing my capabilities. I have never been supported the way I am now and I am even more excited to enter into this career path after May 2025. 🥲😃🥰

stage at graduation. I left the meeting with so much hope, relief, and overall excited for my last semester and my internship experience. They left impressed with me and excited to see what I can do in this field. I have never been treated this way and I am so happy.

I let them know I am great at communicating before things become an issue and I am very transparent about my needs. They have no worries about me doing well and they even affirmed that they are so excited to have me as a peer in this career. They are excited to work with me and watch me walk the

By the time it was my turn to ask questions, they had covered everything and more. They relieved my intense stress I’ve had for weeks and reassured me that they will be standing by me the entire way. All I could do what thank them and reiterate how grateful I am for them.

They explained to me exactly how they were going to support me and what accommodations they set for me (which is more than I originally was even asking for!) they reassured me that they will do anything and everything to make sure I succeed and graduate.

And it did NOT go like that at all. They started off with thanking me for being proactive and gathering them for the meeting and not putting it off until a problem arises. They commended me on my professionalism, intelligence and knowledge on advocating for myself properly.

Thank you!!!

But I am going into the meeting with an open mind and hopeful they’re willing to work with me and my accommodations. I am fully prepared and ready to take this further if they decide to work against me. But I am hopeful.

I specifically got into this career to never have to deal with patients. When I got approved for the program I was NEVER told these would be the requirements to graduate. They waited 4 years, until my time to graduate to inform me I would have to do backflips on broken legs to graduate.

I am going into the medical field but into tech. I will be dealing with data and softwares. Not patients. Yet our requirements to graduate out of my program, are nursing requirements. Wonderful, right? They admitted they haven’t updated the requirements for my career.