That’s not an option where I am. AA is not really a thing here. 😅

A God box? Is that a religious thing? Or did you mean a good box for putting things in to keep?

It’s great that you found something that helps for you, and that you took your time trying to help. But that advice isn’t suitable for my situation. But thanks for sharing.

That actually makes a lot of sense. Simple but on point. Thanks!

Hahaha! Who knows, non-addicts are too polite to call you out to your face usually so.

It is! I found no help in traditional therapy and the likes. So I started reading cognitive neuropsychology as well as reading up on the basics. Like what is the difference between an emotion and a feeling? What are the basic skills you should have at age 3? Is your inner voice yours or parent?

I’ll say this though. I’m crying and laughing looking at those photos, knowing I really thought nobody could tell I wasn’t sober 😭😂

I’ve felt shame because of sexual abuse. I thought it was my fault. Apparently our brains do that to soothe us. If it’s my fault, I have the power to make sure it never happens again. I have control. Shame is easier than accepting that we have no control over other people’s behavior towards you.

I’m happy you did the work, and now accept yourself ❤️

And envy is supposed to motivate you. It’s telling you that you are not satisfied with your life. So you should work to make that happen. But again, we don’t accept, because we do not want to work. So we resent those who do.

Like shame is supposed to make us change behavior. You tell a racist joke at work, your colleagues shame you. You go home, contemplate, and you don’t tell racist jokes at work anymore because people don’t like that. But since we don’t like being uncomfortable, we just start to resent them.

I used to feel the same. However I read a book about shame written by a professor who researches shame. And it talked about how all our emotions have a purpose. And how the vilification of negative emotions is making us afraid and unwilling to listen so we get stuck instead of resolving them.

Even though my anxiety disagrees, I don’t mind feeling shame. The purpose of the emotion is to alert you that you have behaved in a socially unacceptable manner. So you can correct your behavior. And instead of suppressing negative emotions in fear, I need to learn to listen. No using, no shame.