Ever since graduating, getting out of my bed takes extra effort. It's like, when there's no one to force me to get up and live my life, I won't do it for myself. Even though I know this is very unhealthy. I need to gather the strength to look at the world with joy once more. And get my life around..

Yesterday I had the realization of what my situation really is and I used to think that it was my fault that I'm the way that I am, and I was shown that I'm not supposed to feel guilty, and it's rather opposite to that. For some reason it came as shocking to me though I always knew it on the inside.

Currently inside the bell jar

Why does no one really take interest in getting to know me?
Am I just an open book to everybody or is it that I'm just not interesting enough?
I feel like I can be taken for granted and I always try my best to really get to know others, but no one does the same with me
I'm just really lonely

When I grow up

Life has been so boring these days

i wonder when we truly reach our limits, and if it's simply when we just won't stand ourselves anymore

die die die

fulfillment just adds fuel to the blaze

I am a love suicide

blueskai

Nazis f*ck off

Today was one of the first times I enjoyed a social event with strangers. Sure, there were cool people that I knew and was somewhat close but before that didn't even help at all and I'd just stay in my own little corner feeling anxious.
Maybe I'm just being hopeful but I feel this is a step up.

yooo