Mother Boswick
@motherboswick.bsky.social
Mother Boswick has 14 dead husbands She lives in Squinch Hollow a lovely hamlet nestled between Oregon, Texas, Nebraska and New Hampshire
https://linktr.ee/motherboswick
https://linktr.ee/motherboswick
I was doing an astrological reading for my dear friend Priscilla Pennysaver. She’s a Pulsating Ferret with an ascending sign of The Overweight Emu.
When I found out her moon sign is The Protesting Spider, I don’t believe we can be friends anymore.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
When I found out her moon sign is The Protesting Spider, I don’t believe we can be friends anymore.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
January 9, 2026 at 8:24 PM
I was doing an astrological reading for my dear friend Priscilla Pennysaver. She’s a Pulsating Ferret with an ascending sign of The Overweight Emu.
When I found out her moon sign is The Protesting Spider, I don’t believe we can be friends anymore.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
When I found out her moon sign is The Protesting Spider, I don’t believe we can be friends anymore.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
I live in the little hamlet of Squinch Hollow.
We’re named after Squinch the Redeemer, who died for our sins because of an argument over a turkey sandwich. Scholars disagree if whether it was a Hoagie or a Grinder.
In Squinch Name We Pray.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
We’re named after Squinch the Redeemer, who died for our sins because of an argument over a turkey sandwich. Scholars disagree if whether it was a Hoagie or a Grinder.
In Squinch Name We Pray.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
January 8, 2026 at 2:17 AM
I live in the little hamlet of Squinch Hollow.
We’re named after Squinch the Redeemer, who died for our sins because of an argument over a turkey sandwich. Scholars disagree if whether it was a Hoagie or a Grinder.
In Squinch Name We Pray.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
We’re named after Squinch the Redeemer, who died for our sins because of an argument over a turkey sandwich. Scholars disagree if whether it was a Hoagie or a Grinder.
In Squinch Name We Pray.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
2026 is the year of the sunburned alpaca, which as you all know, means we can expect abundance. Invest everything and anything in Land O Lakes. It's a growth stock, Barry loves their butter.
Have a wonderful 2026, the year of The Sunburned Alpaca.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Have a wonderful 2026, the year of The Sunburned Alpaca.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
January 3, 2026 at 3:46 AM
2026 is the year of the sunburned alpaca, which as you all know, means we can expect abundance. Invest everything and anything in Land O Lakes. It's a growth stock, Barry loves their butter.
Have a wonderful 2026, the year of The Sunburned Alpaca.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Have a wonderful 2026, the year of The Sunburned Alpaca.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
I want to mention Mayor Bottom Feeder; he said he wouldn’t sue me for lighting his toupee on fire if I thanked him publicly for being wonderful. Oh my…as difficult as it is…thank you Mayor Bottom Feeder for being wonderful.
The truth tomorrow,
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
The truth tomorrow,
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
January 1, 2026 at 1:17 AM
I want to mention Mayor Bottom Feeder; he said he wouldn’t sue me for lighting his toupee on fire if I thanked him publicly for being wonderful. Oh my…as difficult as it is…thank you Mayor Bottom Feeder for being wonderful.
The truth tomorrow,
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
The truth tomorrow,
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Your last chance to see Mother Boswick....until 2026. The Palace Theatre New Year's Eve Extravaganza! www.thepalacetheatersf.com/nye
December 29, 2025 at 10:47 PM
Your last chance to see Mother Boswick....until 2026. The Palace Theatre New Year's Eve Extravaganza! www.thepalacetheatersf.com/nye
If you encounter wrongly hung toilet paper…(coming from the underside); you’re in a house that communes with the devil. This is the way they recruit.
Report them to your local Rabbi or the check out person at the Piggly Wiggly. They will know what to do.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Report them to your local Rabbi or the check out person at the Piggly Wiggly. They will know what to do.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
December 29, 2025 at 8:09 PM
If you encounter wrongly hung toilet paper…(coming from the underside); you’re in a house that communes with the devil. This is the way they recruit.
Report them to your local Rabbi or the check out person at the Piggly Wiggly. They will know what to do.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Report them to your local Rabbi or the check out person at the Piggly Wiggly. They will know what to do.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
oin Mother Boswick NYE at The Palace. We'll be discussing LOVE, CHILDREARING, CAREER ADVICE and possibly my athletes foot. Come For the Advice...Stay Because I Stole Your Shoes. www.thepalacetheatersf.com/nye
December 28, 2025 at 12:40 AM
oin Mother Boswick NYE at The Palace. We'll be discussing LOVE, CHILDREARING, CAREER ADVICE and possibly my athletes foot. Come For the Advice...Stay Because I Stole Your Shoes. www.thepalacetheatersf.com/nye
We had a surprise visit from my brother Lucious for the holidays. He’s just a delight. 4 foot 1 inch tall, 380 pounds and full of cheer…he drinks a lot.
He’s like a beachball with a mustache.
I adore my little brother Lucious.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
He’s like a beachball with a mustache.
I adore my little brother Lucious.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
December 28, 2025 at 12:36 AM
We had a surprise visit from my brother Lucious for the holidays. He’s just a delight. 4 foot 1 inch tall, 380 pounds and full of cheer…he drinks a lot.
He’s like a beachball with a mustache.
I adore my little brother Lucious.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
He’s like a beachball with a mustache.
I adore my little brother Lucious.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
My Barry is an entrepreneur, he opened a toenail clipper sharpening station on Squinch Way and Squinch Blvd. Near Squinch Square, here in Squinch Hollow.
“Toenail Clippers So Sharp They Not Only Cut Your Nails But They’ll Cut Your Toe Right Off”
Barry is So clever
yours Always,
Mother Boswick
“Toenail Clippers So Sharp They Not Only Cut Your Nails But They’ll Cut Your Toe Right Off”
Barry is So clever
yours Always,
Mother Boswick
December 17, 2025 at 12:45 AM
My Barry is an entrepreneur, he opened a toenail clipper sharpening station on Squinch Way and Squinch Blvd. Near Squinch Square, here in Squinch Hollow.
“Toenail Clippers So Sharp They Not Only Cut Your Nails But They’ll Cut Your Toe Right Off”
Barry is So clever
yours Always,
Mother Boswick
“Toenail Clippers So Sharp They Not Only Cut Your Nails But They’ll Cut Your Toe Right Off”
Barry is So clever
yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Oh my…Mrs Claus had an unfortunate accident. You really shouldn’t use matches after Santa had milk. He’s lactose intolerant and had gas…
I’m sure her eyebrows will grow back.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
I’m sure her eyebrows will grow back.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
December 2, 2025 at 4:53 AM
Oh my…Mrs Claus had an unfortunate accident. You really shouldn’t use matches after Santa had milk. He’s lactose intolerant and had gas…
I’m sure her eyebrows will grow back.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
I’m sure her eyebrows will grow back.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Oh My…I’ve been accused of following trends. I find that sus…
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick (67)
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick (67)
November 28, 2025 at 1:59 AM
Oh My…I’ve been accused of following trends. I find that sus…
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick (67)
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick (67)
Oh my…I just saw Mayor Bottomfeeder coming out of The Toupee and Dog Grooming Emporium.
On the window it says “NO TWO TOUPEES EVER ALIKE-MADE FROM REAL DOG HAIR”
There’s a sale going on, no toupee over $9!
I’m glad to see he’s taking care of his appearance.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
On the window it says “NO TWO TOUPEES EVER ALIKE-MADE FROM REAL DOG HAIR”
There’s a sale going on, no toupee over $9!
I’m glad to see he’s taking care of his appearance.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
November 27, 2025 at 2:13 AM
Oh my…I just saw Mayor Bottomfeeder coming out of The Toupee and Dog Grooming Emporium.
On the window it says “NO TWO TOUPEES EVER ALIKE-MADE FROM REAL DOG HAIR”
There’s a sale going on, no toupee over $9!
I’m glad to see he’s taking care of his appearance.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
On the window it says “NO TWO TOUPEES EVER ALIKE-MADE FROM REAL DOG HAIR”
There’s a sale going on, no toupee over $9!
I’m glad to see he’s taking care of his appearance.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Martin and Martin Funeral Services always puts out a fresh cheese platter on Monday. We do love a cheese platter here in Squinch Hollow.
Get there early in the week. by Friday, the cheese gets a fine fuzz on it
I use Martin and Martin for all my dead husbands.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Get there early in the week. by Friday, the cheese gets a fine fuzz on it
I use Martin and Martin for all my dead husbands.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
November 24, 2025 at 8:40 PM
Martin and Martin Funeral Services always puts out a fresh cheese platter on Monday. We do love a cheese platter here in Squinch Hollow.
Get there early in the week. by Friday, the cheese gets a fine fuzz on it
I use Martin and Martin for all my dead husbands.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Get there early in the week. by Friday, the cheese gets a fine fuzz on it
I use Martin and Martin for all my dead husbands.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Oh my…My son Barry and I just went through “The Holy Car Wash”. Rabbi Theadosia Hornbeam (Archbishop of our Jewish Episcopalian Faith). Blessed the soapy water and now-not only is your car clean; you’re absolved of yours sins.
Plus I had a coupon!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Plus I had a coupon!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
November 23, 2025 at 5:52 PM
Oh my…My son Barry and I just went through “The Holy Car Wash”. Rabbi Theadosia Hornbeam (Archbishop of our Jewish Episcopalian Faith). Blessed the soapy water and now-not only is your car clean; you’re absolved of yours sins.
Plus I had a coupon!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Plus I had a coupon!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
My Barry collects flower petals from around the neighborhood. So many people would waste them by drying them and placing them in the bathroom.
Barry and I eat the flower petals. Barry calls it poopery.
When one of us passes gas it smells like a fresh spring day
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Barry and I eat the flower petals. Barry calls it poopery.
When one of us passes gas it smells like a fresh spring day
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
poopery.so
November 23, 2025 at 4:26 AM
My Barry collects flower petals from around the neighborhood. So many people would waste them by drying them and placing them in the bathroom.
Barry and I eat the flower petals. Barry calls it poopery.
When one of us passes gas it smells like a fresh spring day
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Barry and I eat the flower petals. Barry calls it poopery.
When one of us passes gas it smells like a fresh spring day
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
There have been a rash of missing cats I do hope it wasn’t my Barry…
My son Barry has developed a taste for cats and kittens. Plus he’s gained weight…
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
My son Barry has developed a taste for cats and kittens. Plus he’s gained weight…
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
November 17, 2025 at 2:23 AM
There have been a rash of missing cats I do hope it wasn’t my Barry…
My son Barry has developed a taste for cats and kittens. Plus he’s gained weight…
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
My son Barry has developed a taste for cats and kittens. Plus he’s gained weight…
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Oh my…our mayor of Squinch Hollow. Mayor Bottomfeader, had bad words sunscreened onto his bald head.
He’s now Velcroed his toupee on so it won’t happen again.
I suspect Barry. Oh my he can be such a joker.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
He’s now Velcroed his toupee on so it won’t happen again.
I suspect Barry. Oh my he can be such a joker.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
November 13, 2025 at 5:56 PM
Oh my…our mayor of Squinch Hollow. Mayor Bottomfeader, had bad words sunscreened onto his bald head.
He’s now Velcroed his toupee on so it won’t happen again.
I suspect Barry. Oh my he can be such a joker.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
He’s now Velcroed his toupee on so it won’t happen again.
I suspect Barry. Oh my he can be such a joker.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Our culinary master Ursula Nixon (no relation) just opened our very first food truck.
The pulled pork and cappuccino salon.
It’s really a 1974 rambler station wagon with a defibrillator on the passenger seat.
Yum
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
The pulled pork and cappuccino salon.
It’s really a 1974 rambler station wagon with a defibrillator on the passenger seat.
Yum
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
November 11, 2025 at 3:16 PM
Our culinary master Ursula Nixon (no relation) just opened our very first food truck.
The pulled pork and cappuccino salon.
It’s really a 1974 rambler station wagon with a defibrillator on the passenger seat.
Yum
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
The pulled pork and cappuccino salon.
It’s really a 1974 rambler station wagon with a defibrillator on the passenger seat.
Yum
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Here in Squinch Hollow we love having tourists
Please wear SPF 264 we’re right under the ozone hole. Otherwise you’ll burst into flames.
We do love our visitors.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Please wear SPF 264 we’re right under the ozone hole. Otherwise you’ll burst into flames.
We do love our visitors.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
November 6, 2025 at 3:28 PM
Here in Squinch Hollow we love having tourists
Please wear SPF 264 we’re right under the ozone hole. Otherwise you’ll burst into flames.
We do love our visitors.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Please wear SPF 264 we’re right under the ozone hole. Otherwise you’ll burst into flames.
We do love our visitors.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Oh my…I was born in the year of the farting monkey with an ascending sign of the urinating pit-bull and a moon sign of the bare bottomed gorilla.
Such a unique combination gives me the sight!
Taurus stay at home. Your spouse is cheating.
Such a gift!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Such a unique combination gives me the sight!
Taurus stay at home. Your spouse is cheating.
Such a gift!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
November 2, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Oh my…I was born in the year of the farting monkey with an ascending sign of the urinating pit-bull and a moon sign of the bare bottomed gorilla.
Such a unique combination gives me the sight!
Taurus stay at home. Your spouse is cheating.
Such a gift!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Such a unique combination gives me the sight!
Taurus stay at home. Your spouse is cheating.
Such a gift!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Barry eats the corners of our carpets.
It was a pleasure to see the very honest Benson Squidloop proprietor of Carpets and Snowblower Emporium in downtown Squinch Hollow.
Benson Squidloop suggested I treat the carpets with pepper spray to prevent Barry from munching.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
It was a pleasure to see the very honest Benson Squidloop proprietor of Carpets and Snowblower Emporium in downtown Squinch Hollow.
Benson Squidloop suggested I treat the carpets with pepper spray to prevent Barry from munching.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
October 30, 2025 at 7:31 PM
Barry eats the corners of our carpets.
It was a pleasure to see the very honest Benson Squidloop proprietor of Carpets and Snowblower Emporium in downtown Squinch Hollow.
Benson Squidloop suggested I treat the carpets with pepper spray to prevent Barry from munching.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
It was a pleasure to see the very honest Benson Squidloop proprietor of Carpets and Snowblower Emporium in downtown Squinch Hollow.
Benson Squidloop suggested I treat the carpets with pepper spray to prevent Barry from munching.
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Rabbi Theodosia Hornbeam, Archbishop of our Jewish Episcopalian faith here is Squinch Hollow, blessed the soapy water in the Squinch Ducky Car Wash.
When you walk through all your sins are cleansed. Hot wax $10 extra.
How clever of her
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
When you walk through all your sins are cleansed. Hot wax $10 extra.
How clever of her
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
October 24, 2025 at 11:13 PM
Rabbi Theodosia Hornbeam, Archbishop of our Jewish Episcopalian faith here is Squinch Hollow, blessed the soapy water in the Squinch Ducky Car Wash.
When you walk through all your sins are cleansed. Hot wax $10 extra.
How clever of her
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
When you walk through all your sins are cleansed. Hot wax $10 extra.
How clever of her
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
My boyfriend Erik Von Erickson and I went to BlockbusterVideo for our stay at home date and rented a nature documentary
Jaws
Some awful people were feeding their children to a shark. Simply terrible.
I learned so much about sharks and small town life.
Your Always,
Mother Boswick
Jaws
Some awful people were feeding their children to a shark. Simply terrible.
I learned so much about sharks and small town life.
Your Always,
Mother Boswick
October 23, 2025 at 5:44 PM
My boyfriend Erik Von Erickson and I went to BlockbusterVideo for our stay at home date and rented a nature documentary
Jaws
Some awful people were feeding their children to a shark. Simply terrible.
I learned so much about sharks and small town life.
Your Always,
Mother Boswick
Jaws
Some awful people were feeding their children to a shark. Simply terrible.
I learned so much about sharks and small town life.
Your Always,
Mother Boswick
I was born in the year of the Farting Monkey.Those lucky enough to be born that year have “the vision”
I knew I’d have my son Barry after my illicit affair with an alien space visitor named Grop. He left when he found out I was pregnant.
I do adore Barry but not Grop
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
I knew I’d have my son Barry after my illicit affair with an alien space visitor named Grop. He left when he found out I was pregnant.
I do adore Barry but not Grop
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
October 20, 2025 at 5:46 PM
I was born in the year of the Farting Monkey.Those lucky enough to be born that year have “the vision”
I knew I’d have my son Barry after my illicit affair with an alien space visitor named Grop. He left when he found out I was pregnant.
I do adore Barry but not Grop
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
I knew I’d have my son Barry after my illicit affair with an alien space visitor named Grop. He left when he found out I was pregnant.
I do adore Barry but not Grop
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Oh my…it was so warm here in Squinch Hollow…I went Commando.
Each breeze is like nature’s air conditioning. I may never go back!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Each breeze is like nature’s air conditioning. I may never go back!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
October 14, 2025 at 8:01 PM
Oh my…it was so warm here in Squinch Hollow…I went Commando.
Each breeze is like nature’s air conditioning. I may never go back!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick
Each breeze is like nature’s air conditioning. I may never go back!
Yours Always,
Mother Boswick