"confess your sins anonymously"

"So my name's John Major..."

Gonna be even funnier when Chelsea splash 100m on a Gyokeres or an Osimhen next week.

I've just been sent one from FB

"I'm not one to jump to conclusions, but... STOP THE BOATS"

If jumping to conclusions was an olympic sport....

The kid wearing a Sheffield Wednesday jacket over a Man City strip?

I'm with McAtee on this. And I haven't even played for Sheffield United.

Man U winning just annoys Spurs fans. No one else will care.

Spurs winning annoys Man U and Arsenal fans.

It's a no-brainer.

This is the plot of a Bluey episode

I like it, but feel it would be more balanced with Newcastle along the top, United along the bottom, a small 18 on the left and a small 92 on the right

The Ref, in the stadium, with all the noise, gave a yellow.

Looks like the old bloke from Home Alone

Schar and Joelinton must play for villa given they've both been booked here.

Has always annoyed me when people have said GD is worth a point. It isn't.

Technically, it's worth half a point.

Does nothing if you're a point behind, but moves you up if level. Exactly like half a point would.

Aye, and I've dropped out the race for Sydney Sweeney.

Unless they're also designating the "European Union" as a country too, it's just a semantics mishap in the labelling of the column.

That administration has made some monumental cock ups recently, I don't think this is one of them.

Georgia, I love you, but wtf are you playing at sending this cretin to represent you?

Bruce is an awful person, don't know why the media love to defend him.

Defending his own laziness by criticising Gayle's ability is absolutely pathetic.