Naomeatmybutt
@naomeatmybutt.bsky.social
She/Her. Nebulous co-owner/founder/art director/writer/I don't have a real job title of Commander's Herald, former (?) writer for Hard Drive I mean I'm still in their Slack but don't really check it anymore
https://linktr.ee/growboobsownnoobs
https://linktr.ee/growboobsownnoobs
Pinned
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
While cuffing is typically a term reserved for romantic couplings, experts say this type of pop-culture coupling during the winter season is increasingly common. Other examples include re-downloading Final Fantasy XIV or binge-watching critically acclaimed sitcoms from the 1970s.
Lonely Magic Player Commits to New Format in Cuffing Season | Commander's Herald
ST. CLOUD, MN - Cuffing season is upon us. The time of year when the nights grow longer and colder, pushing people to seek solace in romantic couplings. But one local man has found another way to cope...
commandersherald.com
December 12, 2025 at 6:27 PM
While cuffing is typically a term reserved for romantic couplings, experts say this type of pop-culture coupling during the winter season is increasingly common. Other examples include re-downloading Final Fantasy XIV or binge-watching critically acclaimed sitcoms from the 1970s.
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
"Mere hours after releasing their planned second chapter for Lorwyn Eclipsed, a multiversal sized shadow was cast over the set's moment when the first round of Marvel Super Heroes were spoiled."
Lorwyn Eclipsed Eclipsed | Commander's Herald
Mere hours after releasing their planned second chapter for Lorwyn Eclipsed, a multiversal sized shadow was cast over the set's moment
commandersherald.com
December 11, 2025 at 10:20 PM
"Mere hours after releasing their planned second chapter for Lorwyn Eclipsed, a multiversal sized shadow was cast over the set's moment when the first round of Marvel Super Heroes were spoiled."
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
"The WOTC fix is in. This was always going to happen when Universes Beyond was allowed to go unchecked. I haven't been happy since 1996."
Magic Community Outraged at Show of Good Sportsmanship at Worlds | Commander's Herald
Manfield and Shibata were unavailable for comment due to being busy enjoying their successes this past weekend with their friends and loved ones.
commandersherald.com
December 10, 2025 at 5:23 PM
"The WOTC fix is in. This was always going to happen when Universes Beyond was allowed to go unchecked. I haven't been happy since 1996."
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
"If you think about it, the King James Bible was the first errata. I see your Geralf's Messenger has undying, just like a certain friend of mine. Oh, Parallel Lives multiplies your Food tokens? Hmm, reminds me of some loaves and fishes."
Youth Pastor Knows a Super Cool Legendary Creature You Should Build Around | Commander's Herald
“If you think about it, the King James Bible was the first errata.” said Fyve between handing out fidget spinner crosses.
commandersherald.com
December 9, 2025 at 5:04 PM
"If you think about it, the King James Bible was the first errata. I see your Geralf's Messenger has undying, just like a certain friend of mine. Oh, Parallel Lives multiplies your Food tokens? Hmm, reminds me of some loaves and fishes."
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
"Its rules are taken nearly verbatim from an older card game, known as Euchre, made for a subset of a standard deck of playing cards. This revelation was brought forward after Aunt Eileen offered to teach us the original game following Thanksgiving dinner."
New Fringe Magic Format Secretly Just Euchre | Commander's Herald
A new shared-deck round-based Magic format, has been gaining traction on social media over the past few months.
commandersherald.com
December 8, 2025 at 5:34 PM
"Its rules are taken nearly verbatim from an older card game, known as Euchre, made for a subset of a standard deck of playing cards. This revelation was brought forward after Aunt Eileen offered to teach us the original game following Thanksgiving dinner."
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
While it remains unclear how they mechanically fit into the new set's theme, there's no doubt Bullshit fits nicely with the overall direction of Standard.
New Artifact Token Does Some Bullshit | Commander's Herald
Leaks for the next Magic set reveal that a new artifact token does some bullshit. We break down all the details on the new token.
commandersherald.com
December 5, 2025 at 5:43 PM
While it remains unclear how they mechanically fit into the new set's theme, there's no doubt Bullshit fits nicely with the overall direction of Standard.
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
This Black Friday weekend, try and find as many sales as you can on this incredibly under-rated card, you (and I) won't be disappointed!
This Article Is Trying to Inflate The Price of Spellweaver Volute | Commander's Herald
Spellweaver Volute is flexible, unique, and if this article does what it's supposed to, it'll also be hard to find, so buy them now from me!
commandersherald.com
November 29, 2025 at 2:58 PM
This Black Friday weekend, try and find as many sales as you can on this incredibly under-rated card, you (and I) won't be disappointed!
props to scg for taking out ad space to explain how to tap cards 😀
November 29, 2025 at 9:40 PM
props to scg for taking out ad space to explain how to tap cards 😀
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
"The pony kicked him right in the ass, and he fell straight into the rest of the cake. Went right through the folding table WWE style. Everyone was laughing at this tiny, cute thing terrorizing him. Poor guy told the pony 'I yield! I yield!' I wanted to help, but I was just laughing too hard."
Local Man Realizes He's a CR 0 Encounter After Losing Fight With Son's Birthday Pony | Commander's Herald
OMAHA, NE - Local father and D&D player Phillip Grossman reportedly fell into a midlife crisis after an incident at his son's birthday. Suffering a humiliating defeat at the hooves of a pony rented fo...
commandersherald.com
November 25, 2025 at 6:04 PM
"The pony kicked him right in the ass, and he fell straight into the rest of the cake. Went right through the folding table WWE style. Everyone was laughing at this tiny, cute thing terrorizing him. Poor guy told the pony 'I yield! I yield!' I wanted to help, but I was just laughing too hard."
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
"Nobody wants to buy anything except for rare cards, because they're starting to realize that Monopoly has never been fun to play and that the new generation of My Little Pony isn't as good as that other one. You know, the one with Rainbow Dash?"
Hasbro Executives Begin Burning Wizards of the Coast Office Furniture For Warmth | Commander's Herald
Renton, Washington -- As the harsh winter approaches, Hasbro's board of directors huddle around the burning desk of Carmen Klomparens, hoping to stave off a freezing death for another night. "The trek...
commandersherald.com
November 21, 2025 at 5:29 PM
"Nobody wants to buy anything except for rare cards, because they're starting to realize that Monopoly has never been fun to play and that the new generation of My Little Pony isn't as good as that other one. You know, the one with Rainbow Dash?"
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
"We can't do anything properly in this country without compromise, and I know you'll help me out even though you've never done so before. As a matter of fact, why don't I just give all of the cards to you, so you know how supportive I can be?"
Democrat Congressman Puts All Cards In One Pile For Opponent's Fact or Fiction | Commander's Herald
Washington, D.C. - As the government begins to return to work following the longest government shutdown on record, many returning politicians are starting up their Magic: The Gathering play groups aga...
commandersherald.com
November 17, 2025 at 6:03 PM
"We can't do anything properly in this country without compromise, and I know you'll help me out even though you've never done so before. As a matter of fact, why don't I just give all of the cards to you, so you know how supportive I can be?"
my favorite fall header images :>
November 17, 2025 at 7:51 AM
my favorite fall header images :>
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
Magic: The Gathering Designers Forget To Remove iCarly Ad From Avatar Screenshot Card
commandersherald.com/magic-the-ga...
commandersherald.com/magic-the-ga...
Magic: The Gathering Designers Forget To Remove iCarly Ad From Avatar Screenshot Card | Commander's Herald
using the old CRT TV in my mom's basement. Frankly, the fact that it isn't an in-between frame where Aang looks like a sleep paralysis demon is a miracle."
commandersherald.com
November 12, 2025 at 6:05 PM
Magic: The Gathering Designers Forget To Remove iCarly Ad From Avatar Screenshot Card
commandersherald.com/magic-the-ga...
commandersherald.com/magic-the-ga...
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
Commander Opponent With Ouija Board Playmat Swears They Aren't Targeting You
Commander Opponent With Ouija Board Playmat Swears They Aren't Targeting You | Commander's Herald
"I thought it was my grandma guiding me from above, but after spelling out 'p l a y w a r p w o r l d' , I'm pretty sure it's someone from the other place."
commandersherald.com
November 3, 2025 at 5:18 PM
Commander Opponent With Ouija Board Playmat Swears They Aren't Targeting You
pls join it's good/I'm so tired
WE ARE LOOKING FOR WRITERS!
Come compete in the high-octane world of Magic: The Gathering satire! Fill out this form to apply: tinyurl.com/heraldapply
Come compete in the high-octane world of Magic: The Gathering satire! Fill out this form to apply: tinyurl.com/heraldapply
October 27, 2025 at 11:08 PM
pls join it's good/I'm so tired
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
Socially Anxious Sliver Makes Family Worry
(silly thing i did way too much research on for no reason like two years ago)
commandersherald.com/socially-anx...
(silly thing i did way too much research on for no reason like two years ago)
commandersherald.com/socially-anx...
Socially Anxious Sliver Makes Family Worry | Commander's Herald
"I just don't want everyone else looking at me and thinking I'm weird." buzzed Uneasy Sliver through the great hum.
commandersherald.com
October 22, 2025 at 6:32 AM
Socially Anxious Sliver Makes Family Worry
(silly thing i did way too much research on for no reason like two years ago)
commandersherald.com/socially-anx...
(silly thing i did way too much research on for no reason like two years ago)
commandersherald.com/socially-anx...
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
Magic: The Gathering Survey Asks Players Which Content Creators They Suspect Are Communists
commandersherald.com/magic-the-ga...
commandersherald.com/magic-the-ga...
Magic: The Gathering Survey Asks Players Which Content Creators They Suspect Are Communists | Commander's Herald
studies/one guy who talks louder than everyone else have shown that not saying nice things about card games is linked directly to the Soviet ideology.
commandersherald.com
October 20, 2025 at 4:46 PM
Magic: The Gathering Survey Asks Players Which Content Creators They Suspect Are Communists
commandersherald.com/magic-the-ga...
commandersherald.com/magic-the-ga...
Reposted by Naomeatmybutt
@maro254.bsky.social r u ok
October 3, 2025 at 8:27 PM
@maro254.bsky.social r u ok