him: what are you reading
her: the art of happy moving
him: what’s it about
her: moving cross-country in an organized, stress-free way
1/2
him: what are you reading
her: the art of happy moving
him: what’s it about
her: moving cross-country in an organized, stress-free way
1/2
my wife, almost in tears: but we’ve been married for nearly eighteen years
me: i’m sorry
her: can we watch it right now
me: sure
her, wiping her eyes: this means a lot to me
i guarantee that she doesn’t know who john woo is but she loves this film
here we go
my wife, almost in tears: but we’ve been married for nearly eighteen years
me: i’m sorry
her: can we watch it right now
me: sure
her, wiping her eyes: this means a lot to me
i guarantee that she doesn’t know who john woo is but she loves this film
here we go
I have literally laughed aloud, shed tears, and pumped my fist with enthusiasm.
It’s fantastically performed as an audiobook and I highly recommend it.
I have literally laughed aloud, shed tears, and pumped my fist with enthusiasm.
It’s fantastically performed as an audiobook and I highly recommend it.
"One day, you'll set your child down for the last time, never to pick them up again."
It implanted a deep existential dread inside me & whenever I remember it, I go pick up one of my kids.
"Dad, I’m 15, stop.”
Not yet, buddy.
"One day, you'll set your child down for the last time, never to pick them up again."
It implanted a deep existential dread inside me & whenever I remember it, I go pick up one of my kids.
"Dad, I’m 15, stop.”
Not yet, buddy.
marxist: yes wait there and i'll check you in soon
me: i'll be right here waiting for you
marxist (with a knowing smile): you're going to fit in just fine
marxist: yes wait there and i'll check you in soon
me: i'll be right here waiting for you
marxist (with a knowing smile): you're going to fit in just fine
me, to him: are you going to tell me i’m wrong
my wife, overhearing, to no one: she came down in a bubble doug
i could not love that woman more than i do
me, to him: are you going to tell me i’m wrong
my wife, overhearing, to no one: she came down in a bubble doug
i could not love that woman more than i do
veronica.
allegedly
sandra.
quintessentially
catherine.
visibly
gladys.
casually
florence.
veronica.
allegedly
sandra.
quintessentially
catherine.
visibly
gladys.
casually
florence.
"How should we end this movie that takes place in China and is about the exploits of the Chinese people?"
"A Stevie Wonder song?"
"For a movie about China?"
"What if it features 98 Degrees?"
"Oh, that's perfect. That fixes the issue completely."
"How should we end this movie that takes place in China and is about the exploits of the Chinese people?"
"A Stevie Wonder song?"
"For a movie about China?"
"What if it features 98 Degrees?"
"Oh, that's perfect. That fixes the issue completely."
Molasses, lemon juice, apple cider vinegar, and ginger. Sort of kombucha-like. Honestly pretty great.
Molasses, lemon juice, apple cider vinegar, and ginger. Sort of kombucha-like. Honestly pretty great.
him: dad if mom divorces you can we get another dog
me: of course, totally
him: that's what i thought
me: i mean, i don't want her to divorce me
him: me either, but i really want another dog
me: surely there's an easier way
him: i doubt it
him: dad if mom divorces you can we get another dog
me: of course, totally
him: that's what i thought
me: i mean, i don't want her to divorce me
him: me either, but i really want another dog
me: surely there's an easier way
him: i doubt it
“If we want a garden we’re gonna have to sow the seeds”
The Highwomen made a phenomenal album.
“If we want a garden we’re gonna have to sow the seeds”
The Highwomen made a phenomenal album.
him: okay i did it
his friend: *still talking*
him: please be quiet
his friend: *still talking*
him, pleading: please be quiet and let me have this beautiful story moment in tears of the kingdom
me: he is definitely my kid
him: okay i did it
his friend: *still talking*
him: please be quiet
his friend: *still talking*
him, pleading: please be quiet and let me have this beautiful story moment in tears of the kingdom
me: he is definitely my kid
I can only think of great ones, notably Palm Springs and Edge of Tomorrow.
I can only think of great ones, notably Palm Springs and Edge of Tomorrow.
the wind, moments after i’ve finished: nice try idiot
the wind, moments after i’ve finished: nice try idiot