This In the Onion???

That's an excellent observation. I don't think either of these dudes prioritized raising their kids over their careers. I would guess someone else did the bulk of the work in that area for both of them. Same as it ever was.

Satan is very happy.

My favorite win in a long long time!

Only 5 more wins to beat their total that year!

They’re obviously just trying to reach their arrest quotas.