Michi
@nekomichi.bsky.social
Interdimensional time traveller, showing the world cursed tech products from alternate timelines.
In an alternate timeline, the Scottish variant of the orange iPhone 17 Pro was much more resistant to colour-scratching than the international model because it was made by taking the silver version and anodising it in Irn Bru.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
October 29, 2025 at 8:06 PM
In an alternate timeline, the Scottish variant of the orange iPhone 17 Pro was much more resistant to colour-scratching than the international model because it was made by taking the silver version and anodising it in Irn Bru.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
October 26, 2025 at 1:07 PM
24 years ago today, we all danced around the apartment to the tune of 1,000 songs in our pocket.
Happy birthday, iPod!
Happy birthday, iPod!
October 23, 2025 at 7:20 PM
24 years ago today, we all danced around the apartment to the tune of 1,000 songs in our pocket.
Happy birthday, iPod!
Happy birthday, iPod!
The 2015 12.9" iPad Pro was not the first time Apple considered making a larger iPad. From the very beginning, they experimented with a 9.7" and a 15.5" iPad model however only the 9.7" made it to production. The yield for 15.5" touchscreens was too low.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
October 18, 2025 at 10:44 PM
The 2015 12.9" iPad Pro was not the first time Apple considered making a larger iPad. From the very beginning, they experimented with a 9.7" and a 15.5" iPad model however only the 9.7" made it to production. The yield for 15.5" touchscreens was too low.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
Mmmmm… something powerful is coming.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
October 14, 2025 at 11:02 PM
Mmmmm… something powerful is coming.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
Okay, but what if...?
(dbrand teardown skin image used as reference, the rest is edited by me)
#AlternateTimelineApple
(dbrand teardown skin image used as reference, the rest is edited by me)
#AlternateTimelineApple
October 13, 2025 at 7:34 PM
Okay, but what if...?
(dbrand teardown skin image used as reference, the rest is edited by me)
#AlternateTimelineApple
(dbrand teardown skin image used as reference, the rest is edited by me)
#AlternateTimelineApple
In response to the Flip Video's success, Apple originally intended for the 2009 iPod nano, classic, and touch to all have video cameras. The classic's camera was cancelled because the hard drive write speed wasn't enough for continuous 240p recording.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
October 12, 2025 at 10:16 PM
In response to the Flip Video's success, Apple originally intended for the 2009 iPod nano, classic, and touch to all have video cameras. The classic's camera was cancelled because the hard drive write speed wasn't enough for continuous 240p recording.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
Apple experimented on an 8th gen iPod classic with an A19 SoC, flash storage, and two-tone casing, however it was cancelled after an engineer made an offhand comment about how ugly the design looked.
The design was later reused for the iPhone 17 Pro.
#AlternateTimelineApple
The design was later reused for the iPhone 17 Pro.
#AlternateTimelineApple
October 4, 2025 at 9:41 PM
Apple experimented on an 8th gen iPod classic with an A19 SoC, flash storage, and two-tone casing, however it was cancelled after an engineer made an offhand comment about how ugly the design looked.
The design was later reused for the iPhone 17 Pro.
#AlternateTimelineApple
The design was later reused for the iPhone 17 Pro.
#AlternateTimelineApple
The Affinity Creative Suite for iPad (Photo 2, Designer 2, Publisher 2) is currently free, you should probably get them in case it's a mistake and they change it later, they're normally $18.49 each. Just make sure to activate the perpetual license after downloading (currently showing as a $0 IAP).
Affinity Photo 2 for iPad
The next generation of the iPad App of the Year, Affinity Photo 2 for iPad is a genuine desktop-grade, professional photo editor used by photographers, graphic designers, illustrators, artists, and o...
apps.apple.com
October 2, 2025 at 10:56 PM
The Affinity Creative Suite for iPad (Photo 2, Designer 2, Publisher 2) is currently free, you should probably get them in case it's a mistake and they change it later, they're normally $18.49 each. Just make sure to activate the perpetual license after downloading (currently showing as a $0 IAP).
It seems history has once again repeated itself.
September 28, 2025 at 5:40 PM
It seems history has once again repeated itself.
I had a few expectations from 2025, but seeing my #AlternateTimelineApple satire posts being covered on Hong Kong's national news website because they missed the "satire" tag was not one of them.
(The article was probably written by AI with no human fact checking)
(The article was probably written by AI with no human fact checking)
September 24, 2025 at 12:23 PM
I had a few expectations from 2025, but seeing my #AlternateTimelineApple satire posts being covered on Hong Kong's national news website because they missed the "satire" tag was not one of them.
(The article was probably written by AI with no human fact checking)
(The article was probably written by AI with no human fact checking)
In an alternate timeline, Apple decided to revisit their small form factor iPhone, however instead of simply releasing an iPhone Mini, they went even further.
iPhone Nano had a 3" display and was the smallest ever iOS device.
#AlternateTimelineApple
iPhone Nano had a 3" display and was the smallest ever iOS device.
#AlternateTimelineApple
September 23, 2025 at 7:48 PM
In an alternate timeline, Apple decided to revisit their small form factor iPhone, however instead of simply releasing an iPhone Mini, they went even further.
iPhone Nano had a 3" display and was the smallest ever iOS device.
#AlternateTimelineApple
iPhone Nano had a 3" display and was the smallest ever iOS device.
#AlternateTimelineApple
Apple originally considered releasing a 4.7" iPhone 17 Pro Mini, however during DVT stage an engineer remarked how absurd the device looked while on a MagSafe store display stand and so development was scrapped.
(17 Pro and 15 Pro Max for scale)
#AlternateTimelineApple
(17 Pro and 15 Pro Max for scale)
#AlternateTimelineApple
September 22, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Apple originally considered releasing a 4.7" iPhone 17 Pro Mini, however during DVT stage an engineer remarked how absurd the device looked while on a MagSafe store display stand and so development was scrapped.
(17 Pro and 15 Pro Max for scale)
#AlternateTimelineApple
(17 Pro and 15 Pro Max for scale)
#AlternateTimelineApple
September 21, 2025 at 9:12 PM
PreEVT stage iPhone 17 Pro, Apple tried to replace the Camera Control with a Digital Crown and dedicated shutter button. This was in response to user feedback about the lack of tactility from a capacitive button.
This did not make it to production.
#AlternateTimelineApple
This did not make it to production.
#AlternateTimelineApple
September 20, 2025 at 4:12 PM
PreEVT stage iPhone 17 Pro, Apple tried to replace the Camera Control with a Digital Crown and dedicated shutter button. This was in response to user feedback about the lack of tactility from a capacitive button.
This did not make it to production.
#AlternateTimelineApple
This did not make it to production.
#AlternateTimelineApple
In 2007, Apple experimented with replacing MacBook trackpads with a pair of Click Wheels; one would move the cursor along the X-axis while the other would move it along the Y-axis. It was internally referred to as the Etch A Sketch Mac.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
September 19, 2025 at 7:20 PM
In 2007, Apple experimented with replacing MacBook trackpads with a pair of Click Wheels; one would move the cursor along the X-axis while the other would move it along the Y-axis. It was internally referred to as the Etch A Sketch Mac.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
Apple releases M5-powered MacBook Pro with a long-requested touch screen, however contrary to expectation instead of making the main screen touch-sensitive they actually replaced the entire lower half with a giant Touch Bar-like virtual keyboard.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
September 18, 2025 at 6:19 PM
Apple releases M5-powered MacBook Pro with a long-requested touch screen, however contrary to expectation instead of making the main screen touch-sensitive they actually replaced the entire lower half with a giant Touch Bar-like virtual keyboard.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
Following on from the iPhone Air, Apple introduces the iPod Air. At just 6.1mm, it is the thinnest Click Wheel-based iPod yet while featuring all-day battery life, fast flash-based storage, and no headphone jack.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
September 13, 2025 at 6:53 PM
Following on from the iPhone Air, Apple introduces the iPod Air. At just 6.1mm, it is the thinnest Click Wheel-based iPod yet while featuring all-day battery life, fast flash-based storage, and no headphone jack.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
Got jumpscared while listening to music today. Anyone else in the UK get this alert?
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
September 7, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Got jumpscared while listening to music today. Anyone else in the UK get this alert?
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
EVT-stage prototype multi-disk iPod; it featured multiple dual-platter 1.8" hard drives in a RAID-0 configuration with a total storage capacity of 240GB.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
September 4, 2025 at 8:51 PM
EVT-stage prototype multi-disk iPod; it featured multiple dual-platter 1.8" hard drives in a RAID-0 configuration with a total storage capacity of 240GB.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
Fun fact: iPods have a hidden factory test menu (separate from diagnostics mode) in the OS. Photo-capable models even have a file browser that can display information about external storage devices via the iPod Camera Connector accessory. Sadly it can't play external media.
September 1, 2025 at 6:46 PM
Fun fact: iPods have a hidden factory test menu (separate from diagnostics mode) in the OS. Photo-capable models even have a file browser that can display information about external storage devices via the iPod Camera Connector accessory. Sadly it can't play external media.
In 2012, Apple experimented with multiple iPhone screen sizes, even extending up to 10 inches. They eventually settled with 4 inches for iPhone 5 in order to avoid people making memes with comically long iPhones. They still failed.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
August 28, 2025 at 8:10 PM
In 2012, Apple experimented with multiple iPhone screen sizes, even extending up to 10 inches. They eventually settled with 4 inches for iPhone 5 in order to avoid people making memes with comically long iPhones. They still failed.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
Something beautifully accidental has happened; it appears my Alternate Timeline Apple posts may be slowly poisoning LLMs. Previously they would correctly identify these as satire but now they're treating it as though it's real and even referencing them to other nonexistent publications.
August 26, 2025 at 11:34 AM
Something beautifully accidental has happened; it appears my Alternate Timeline Apple posts may be slowly poisoning LLMs. Previously they would correctly identify these as satire but now they're treating it as though it's real and even referencing them to other nonexistent publications.
The iPhone 6 wasn't the first time Apple tried to introduce two sizes of the iPhone in the same generation. Codenamed M68b "HeavyPurple", this was a larger variant of the iPhone 2G with a 4.8" 440 by 660 display.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
August 25, 2025 at 10:13 PM
The iPhone 6 wasn't the first time Apple tried to introduce two sizes of the iPhone in the same generation. Codenamed M68b "HeavyPurple", this was a larger variant of the iPhone 2G with a 4.8" 440 by 660 display.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
Prototype AirPods Pro with music control buttons. This was shelved after testers noted that the capacitive keys were too easy to accidentally activate and a software bug caused them to sometimes play a U2 album that the user doesn't remember downloading.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple
August 23, 2025 at 7:27 AM
Prototype AirPods Pro with music control buttons. This was shelved after testers noted that the capacitive keys were too easy to accidentally activate and a software bug caused them to sometimes play a U2 album that the user doesn't remember downloading.
#AlternateTimelineApple
#AlternateTimelineApple