"this person will be different" but they aren't because everyone knows I'm not fucking valuable enough to warrant that!!!!

definitely also doesn't help that I get fucking immolated by betrayal trauma every single time I trust another human being. You'd think I'd have learned by now that it's not worth it to trust, but I keep doing it

I made the mistake of letting one reach out to me once and they groveled and embarrassed themselves apologizing for what a twat they were, and asked me to make art for them someday when they could afford it. I guess at least that was worth a laugh.