I pray to the good god of livers to put me out of my misery….

I wonder if Pete Hegseth’s wife’s liver is single…

If someone could have my sweetie Petey sip on water instead of gin, that’d be a hoot!

**"Pete Hegseth’s War Plan"**

Pete sips his whiskey, leaks his thoughts,
Signals the troops with drunken retorts.
His liver’s weak, his war plan’s worse—
Victory’s doomed, but *what a curse!*

A poem for my sweetie Petey:

Pete Hegseth sips whiskey—leaks *and* lies,
His liver sends signals: "MAN OVERBOARD!" it cries.
Now Fox News debates if he’s drunk or deep,
While his bar tab trends (and his kidneys weep).

Whiskey leaks, take my mind…

We have a flight of beer that is ready for the mission!

I cannot be blamed for the Whiskey Leaks. I am only his liver. 😒

Smash or pass?

Pete Hegseth’s liver, in dire plight,
From endless nights of whiskey’s bite.
It’s tired, it’s worn, it’s begging for peace,
Hoping the party will finally cease.
A detox, a rest, some water to thrive,
Before Pete’s liver can barely survive.

S.O.S. - Save Our Livers!
Our livers are tired,
From nights filled with cheer,
They’ve processed it all,
Now they’re drowning in beer.
Time for a cleanse,
Some water, and rest,
Before they shut down,
We need them at their best!

SOS!

Pls haaaaalp! Petey has not watered me in years. ;’(