Amy
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pfftmaybe.bsky.social
Amy
@pfftmaybe.bsky.social
I like long walks to the couch. I talk a lot. A LOT.
Leaving for vacation in 6 days and I’m nowhere near done overpacking yet.
August 28, 2025 at 8:20 PM
Sorry, I’m busy
August 24, 2025 at 7:22 PM
Deadpan monotone “Was that a satisfactory weinering?”

I….um…don’t know how to respond.
August 21, 2025 at 1:41 AM
I quit my side gig at Walmart just before I could have become Shrimp Girl.
SMH
August 20, 2025 at 4:09 PM
Level 45. Oof.
April 23, 2025 at 9:03 PM
From Office to Date Night, Lazy Edition
February 13, 2025 at 10:47 PM
Such confidence in my tread I had. There are s 3 inches of ice under an inch of snow, but I’m just built different.
February 8, 2025 at 10:08 PM
He insisted a take a nap with him, then wiggled his way under the covers and started snoring. My dog is weird.
February 6, 2025 at 3:20 PM
I untie my garlic knots.
February 3, 2025 at 6:30 PM
January 20, 2025 at 12:50 AM
Why are MAGA?
January 18, 2025 at 6:14 PM
Dropped my pup off at the vet to say goodbye to a couple lifelong friends. I’m sorry, Bud, but it has to be done!
January 16, 2025 at 1:40 PM
I’d like to thank the dong artist for this addition to my car while I was in the grocery store.
January 14, 2025 at 12:14 AM
Omg LOOK AT HER! My beautiful wonk-eyed bitch!
January 11, 2025 at 5:45 PM
Watching my murder shows and thought I recognized this detective. Took me a minute…
January 11, 2025 at 2:28 AM
With this much cuteness it should be illegal to make me get up and go to work.
January 10, 2025 at 12:50 PM
I bought a cart on Temu. It has crates that lift off to transport stuff and the frame collapses like a stroller. I was SUPER excited to push it around Aldi and soak up the envious stares.
This is what I’ve become.
December 23, 2024 at 4:19 AM
We don’t use either of these doors for entry, usually. We shoveled the deck and PLOWED THE YARD because this princess right here doesn’t like to get snow on herself when she poops.
December 21, 2024 at 8:07 PM
I nearly had a heart attack shoveling the deck and three sets of stairs, but my guy was sure to walk by and tell me how turned on he was.
December 21, 2024 at 8:04 PM
Due to production and shipping delays,* we will be sharing New Year’s gifts instead.

*I write a children’s book for family each Christmas and was really into procrastination this year.
December 21, 2024 at 3:49 PM
I was sorta strong-armed into joining our regional Leadership Team. With my level of maturity in the Leadership Zoom Meetings I’m not sure how long they will want my help.
December 19, 2024 at 2:44 PM
My dog won’t go outside willingly in the cold. I usually drag her outside at night in my sexy pink crocs, but tonight I stuck my Santa sock in THIS lovely piece of art. Bitch gets her point across.
December 19, 2024 at 1:58 AM
Sure, I’ll be a team player and wear my company’s name branded on my sleeve, but I’ll also wear my guillotine earrings so everyone knows what team I play for.
December 18, 2024 at 3:20 PM