All this venting aside, I want to say this. Don't let late stage capitalism and its exaggerated gender roles isolate you from genuine human interactions in the coming season.

Lead with, accept, and share love with all who need it that you can. Every little bit counts in a major way.

My sons and nephews definitely have played their parts over the years, too. Watching them enjoy whatever they got together reminded me of me and my closest cousins on Christmas day.

If I'm honest, trying to live up to this standard of patriarchy and masculinity made me suicidal in the past. Visiting my brother, and my nieces especially, made me realize that just being present in the moment is what counts most. My baby girls literally saved my life.

All jokes aside. My example of manhood\masculinity was to be THEE provider. So this time of year it especially sets in and I feel it's my job to make sure everyone in my life has whatever they need\desire.

Gonna be honest. Most birthdays, Christmases and anniversaries I do for myself and others. If I'm honest, I'm afraid to trust others and I still have trauma from the time I told Santa at a military Christmas party in Germany I wanted a full Voltron set and never got it...

Aye! ✋🏿