“I’ll fight until hell freezes over and then I’ll cut the ice and fight on”

I can't be bothered to parody the whole song for the sake of this stupid joke, but it definitely starts:

In a time of early autumn gales I was a freighter,
A good ship and true please don't ask what happened later.

I had a close family member that worked for the GCB. I learned pretty early that it was all a rotten, crooked, and pitiful racket.