He said the same thing about Joe Isuzu.

Tasking it to find a specific Labrador in what looks like the whitest neighborhood in Suburbia seems like a big ask. The fact that it works suggests that some DNA detection is somehow involved.

Lawler: I don’t care if it’s named after Trump or Robert E. Lee or Jefferson Davis as long as the trains run on time to Mussolini International Airport.

It feels true. Good enough for me.

Johnson: ICE agents don't even get street addresses of non deported immigrants. They have to go house to house, kicking in doors just to see if anyone there looks remotely like like they should be deported.

What's the asking price? Because I just found out my kidney is full of urine. Don't ask me how but I guess it's been like that for a while now.

The Onion CEO photoshops himself into photo of Kat Abughazaleh's release, sends to mother as proof of he's married.

I think it means they have to attend a "Melania" screening*.

*ICE will reimburse 20% of ticket cost†

†based on average price of matinee tickets

Trump: I don't want people buying houses. I want people to not be able to sell their homes.

Matt Walsh: Agents had to shot Pretti because assault and battery obviously didn't stop him.