I told someone the other day that I was embarrassed to be an American. They were very put off by it. Apparently they don’t watch the news. I stand by my embarrassment.

Am I the only one who thinks this is a stretch? FIFA asserts its qualification to give a peace award based on the belief that football (soccer) is a unique global unifier that promotes hope, joy, and peace across the world.

Must be exhausting trying to fill the giant void within. Rebuilding the ballroom will be nothing compared to redesigning Mount Rushmore with his ugly puss.

And this is when we blow up the internet with this:

Project 25 becomes reality. What’s taking the grim reaper so long?

Toddler.

I hate that he uses a hyphen between 45 and 47. As if implying he was also 46. Which he believes.

I love him.