Every other Off-Broadway theater job posting:

As a key member of our small but mighty team, you’ll do 9 people’s jobs single-handedly with a graceful smile. Part-time, 70 hrs/week plus nights and weekends. Generous compensation package of $18/hr (no benefits) and a hybrid schedule you can never use

“Alexa, how can I find therapy even though I’m uninsured”

Can’t help but wonder: where’s Zohran going to eat after this?

Karaoke would be interesting to me if the catalogues included niche mid-aughts Christian rock

All this rain but not one clap’a thunder?????? Injustice

The keys in my back pocket? Built-in percussion

Fact: 59° with low humidity and a breeze is the temperature on Cloud 9

I’m WFTE today

Working from the edge

In my cole slaw era

Don’t you ever for a second get it twisted: I’m still the mayor of South Slope

Some of you didn’t have a weird Photobooth phase in 2009 and it shows

"To mount the scaffold, to advance to the muzzles of guns with
perfect nonchalance!"

Devastated to report that the price of Kerrygold has already gone up at my local grocery store by nearly a dollar — American Dream

I loved the weird, wild ride of White Lotus (always do) but frankly found the last 2 music choices of the season absolutely whack

Where’s the Dewey Decimal guy’s biopic?

LaCie would be a nice baby girl’s name