toon
@porchdust.bsky.social
Erika Kirk seems to be the talk of the town these days. I remember when it was JESUS
December 27, 2025 at 12:14 AM
Erika Kirk seems to be the talk of the town these days. I remember when it was JESUS
Every single billionaire ive ever met spiritually resembled one of those small ice cream cone thats made of stytrofoam or some shit like that
December 14, 2025 at 12:20 AM
Every single billionaire ive ever met spiritually resembled one of those small ice cream cone thats made of stytrofoam or some shit like that
Dude its not funny every time you ask me to make the “Erika Kirk face “ , i have to access some dark parts of my psyche to pull it up and it slowly turns my head into more of a Blocky shape
December 13, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Dude its not funny every time you ask me to make the “Erika Kirk face “ , i have to access some dark parts of my psyche to pull it up and it slowly turns my head into more of a Blocky shape
okay fine ill fucking say it: you can stop a UFO in midair with your mind but only if youre mind is retarded enough
December 2, 2025 at 2:44 AM
okay fine ill fucking say it: you can stop a UFO in midair with your mind but only if youre mind is retarded enough
I dont even have any ancestors. Just hecklers that find the nearest bleachers to yell at me from. Its much more motivating
December 2, 2025 at 2:43 AM
I dont even have any ancestors. Just hecklers that find the nearest bleachers to yell at me from. Its much more motivating
Please write mean things about me on the inernet. It strengthens me. It fuels me. But just dont make it too mean
December 1, 2025 at 6:17 PM
Please write mean things about me on the inernet. It strengthens me. It fuels me. But just dont make it too mean
“We announce to you that Mr Beast has just been elected President by a unanimous vote and No, you are not Dreaming. Yyou are in Heaven. This is Heaven. Dont forget to subscribe, like, and hit that button for notifications, the notifications will be sent straight into your brain
November 30, 2025 at 7:34 AM
“We announce to you that Mr Beast has just been elected President by a unanimous vote and No, you are not Dreaming. Yyou are in Heaven. This is Heaven. Dont forget to subscribe, like, and hit that button for notifications, the notifications will be sent straight into your brain
No offense but your God sounds like a total puss ass
November 28, 2025 at 6:41 AM
No offense but your God sounds like a total puss ass
“What is the first thing you would do if you were elected president of the United States?” Crack!!!!!!!!
November 28, 2025 at 6:39 AM
“What is the first thing you would do if you were elected president of the United States?” Crack!!!!!!!!
If i were a mouse id be popping out of holes in the wall like newsflash motherrucker, you have a hole in your wall
November 28, 2025 at 6:36 AM
If i were a mouse id be popping out of holes in the wall like newsflash motherrucker, you have a hole in your wall
Im at the National Theology Conference like “so this God guy, what a recurring character. What’s his deal? Does anyone know?” I cant tell if theyre thinking really hard about the implications or they just don’t like the bit at all
November 20, 2025 at 9:42 PM
Im at the National Theology Conference like “so this God guy, what a recurring character. What’s his deal? Does anyone know?” I cant tell if theyre thinking really hard about the implications or they just don’t like the bit at all
Spiritual awakening feels like being kicked in the nuts by a guy wearing too many beaded necklaces but weirdly you kinda like it
November 20, 2025 at 9:35 PM
Spiritual awakening feels like being kicked in the nuts by a guy wearing too many beaded necklaces but weirdly you kinda like it
All of us here at the Decorum & Discourse ThinkTank are running around pounding our chests like crazed gorillas due to the state of Decorum and Discourse in this country. I hope you know that
November 20, 2025 at 9:24 PM
All of us here at the Decorum & Discourse ThinkTank are running around pounding our chests like crazed gorillas due to the state of Decorum and Discourse in this country. I hope you know that
Im so sorry about my disrespectful comments towards the Late Dick Cheney. I thought we were talking about a different Dick Cheney (my neighbor) who had a brain aneurysm while watching an AI Jake Paul video
November 20, 2025 at 9:18 PM
Im so sorry about my disrespectful comments towards the Late Dick Cheney. I thought we were talking about a different Dick Cheney (my neighbor) who had a brain aneurysm while watching an AI Jake Paul video
Scan this QR code right here to hear me sing a rendition of Mariah Carey’s hit song “This Christmas I Will Suck You” in honor of our fearless leaders
November 20, 2025 at 8:56 PM
Scan this QR code right here to hear me sing a rendition of Mariah Carey’s hit song “This Christmas I Will Suck You” in honor of our fearless leaders
Dont you know it gives old Peepaw quite the scare when you show intellectual progression and cognitive fortitude like that
November 20, 2025 at 6:10 AM
Dont you know it gives old Peepaw quite the scare when you show intellectual progression and cognitive fortitude like that
Walking around stinking up the aisles like it’s your full time job…It’s called Barnes and Noble not Fart and Noble. You can’t fart and still be noble. You automatically become plebeian status when you crop dust me as I’m checking out the new Boris Johnson memoir
November 20, 2025 at 6:08 AM
Walking around stinking up the aisles like it’s your full time job…It’s called Barnes and Noble not Fart and Noble. You can’t fart and still be noble. You automatically become plebeian status when you crop dust me as I’m checking out the new Boris Johnson memoir
i Just heard your new demo and I’m sorry to say but it sounded like poop from a “BUTT” !
November 19, 2025 at 9:41 PM
i Just heard your new demo and I’m sorry to say but it sounded like poop from a “BUTT” !
In the halls of outdated ideas the Big Theology lobbyists waltz around with their ill-fitting robes and references no one understands. “Let them be” my inner Ram Dass Monologue says.. “they are testing your level of Enlightenment” it repeats redundantly but probably necessarily
November 18, 2025 at 9:56 PM
In the halls of outdated ideas the Big Theology lobbyists waltz around with their ill-fitting robes and references no one understands. “Let them be” my inner Ram Dass Monologue says.. “they are testing your level of Enlightenment” it repeats redundantly but probably necessarily
Big Theology keeps trying to silence me because they know i have all the Dirt on which ones of their little leaders cares more about fart sniffing than Living Like Jesus .
November 18, 2025 at 9:47 PM
Big Theology keeps trying to silence me because they know i have all the Dirt on which ones of their little leaders cares more about fart sniffing than Living Like Jesus .
starting to get the feeling complex ptsd can only effect you if your mind is already pretty high capacity cause every person I meet who has this thing is smart ass shit ..
November 18, 2025 at 9:42 PM
starting to get the feeling complex ptsd can only effect you if your mind is already pretty high capacity cause every person I meet who has this thing is smart ass shit ..
Every time you get sad God takes out an obsidian pen and makes a little mark in a notebook. No one knows what the mark means. We don’t know if it’s a good thing or a terrible thing. But let this wisdom provide you solace next time you are low
November 18, 2025 at 12:55 AM
Every time you get sad God takes out an obsidian pen and makes a little mark in a notebook. No one knows what the mark means. We don’t know if it’s a good thing or a terrible thing. But let this wisdom provide you solace next time you are low
i could destroy capitalism with facts and logic but they wont give me a megaphone loud enough to reach the eager ears of the masses
November 18, 2025 at 12:46 AM
i could destroy capitalism with facts and logic but they wont give me a megaphone loud enough to reach the eager ears of the masses
crying alone in the back yard , laughing cordially with others in the front
November 18, 2025 at 12:05 AM
crying alone in the back yard , laughing cordially with others in the front
as someone who sells poison water to kids let me tell you why youre wrong about what you just said
November 18, 2025 at 12:03 AM
as someone who sells poison water to kids let me tell you why youre wrong about what you just said