In my experience, this actually fosters the kind of relational, internal change, as well as the material changes, that can give us glimpses of what liberation can look like.

Support for newcomers doesn't have to come from the most marginalized, who are tired and surviving - people who carry some privilege can learn to support each other and to navigate accountability together.

It's best if that support - which includes accountability out of love - continues in some form throughout the various stages of learning and unlearning and experimenting and finding one's way.

Building truly supportive community with imperfect folks doing imperfect work with a lot of imperfect feelings - and being committed to growing and learning within that - is the only way I've found to bring folks sustainably into the work.

This is something I learned from Black women and immigrant organizers. I find that programmatic approaches fall short on this.

Also not helpful for long-term liberation or even short-term survival.

The only way I know how to bring people into the work is to offer mutual support and relationship as they work through their shame and discomfort.

2. That said, when people wake up to their complicity in oppressive systems, guilt and shame are often present - it's a hard realization. People do a lot of things to evade that shame, too: working into burnout, getting outraged at others like them, leaving, etc.

Here's how I see the tensions.

1. Shame is a tool of white supremacy & oppression, so it's not liberatory. Used long-term as a sole means to compel people, w/o having the power to punish people like capitalism does (i.e., no food or shelter without work), it won't ever be effective.

They were good points about how people actually respond to "you should" messages - but as another person brought up, if the only impetus to organize is a desire, that's too slow for the big immediate work we have in front of us.

Honestly, this is why I coach & do mutual aid work the way I do.

Link for sign up: tinyurl.com/TendTheCommons . You’ll need to complete the form to receive the Zoom link. I really hope to see you there.

Ames Carpenter
Radical Reimagining Life Coaching

Again, these sessions are completely free. Monthly group sessions will be at 7 pm Eastern time, every second Monday evening of the month. The Tending the Commons series will continue for all of 2026. You can attend one session, or some, or all.

These fields include guided meditations, grounding, embodied practices, art, writing prompts, conversation, Tarot, and astrology. Participants will always have a choice of tools to practice and can opt out of any activity.

Also The Commons:
- the stars, their patterns, and the stories we tell about them
- our imaginations

During each 90-minute session, we will learn and practice one or two bite-sized tools, chosen from various fields.

Examples of The Commons are:
- quilt patterns, their meanings passed down through generations
- mycelial networks connecting tree roots
- seeds and their potential
- old photos secured in the local archivist’s attic, waiting for re-discovery
- the circle and its power of connection

They give us the leverage points we need to sustain each other and to build something new. The Commons are the beings and legacies we nurture and relate to in community.

I invite you to come practice these essentials with me in a series of free monthly group coaching sessions, called “Tending the Commons.”

I think of the Commons as the things that capitalists can never fully control or own, though they will try.

As we stumble toward our escape, it feels like we must build our collective toolkit for care and creativity: the two go hand-in-hand and, as history has shown again and again, they are essential for communities to create new liberatory possibilities together.