As I was leaving, Christmas Tree Kardashian was telling them she now needed help to take the tree back to her car. Next, no doubt, she had to go to the salon to return the dye job.

Merry Christmas, everyone! 🎄

I'm sure there was a problem with it. Not flocked enough?

I mouthed bewilderment and apologies to the unbelievably kind and professional Macy's employees who were denying her request. They were amused. I thanked the person who helped me and reminded her (and myself) that most people are good. 3/

It's refreshing! You make me feel like things will be better again someday.

Yesterday morning, as I picked up something I ordered from Macy's, I witnessed this person trying to return her Christmas tree. It was such a comic scene that I had a hard time believing it was actually happening.

This bitch. I thank you. Part of our country has become mean and insane, following a cephalitic felon who is occupying the White House for the time being, but you, partially blonde lady, have reminded me that I can still be shocked by people's regular everyday cluelessness. 1/

Oh, garsh.

19. Literacy! This year, I resolve to read more of a book.

18. I resolve to be myself, unless I can be somebody better, like, I don't know, Charo. Or Lil Xan. Or a combination of the two.