yall ever take a shower that’s so good, when you’re done you feel like a cabinet that got refinished

indirect kiss but it’s when you use the bathroom right after somebody else so you sit down and get the residual butt warmth

they need to make an Office/Parks and Rec style workplace sitcom about a city library

i love my girlfriend so fucking much yall don’t even understand

facebook greeted me this morning with a “blast from the past: remember this?” about my coming-out post from 2016. just shoot me next time would ya