Mm hm! The lying is just unforgiveable imo.

The last group of people who invited me into a similar group, it was nice for a bit, but they were all close friends of my unsustainable situationship. If it's balanced instead on people *I* chose and hobbies *I* enjoy, I'll be less disposable.

This is such a thing. If all I wanted was parasocial connections & likes & hookups & "casual friends" I'd be golden, but that isn't enough for me.

Ooof, I relate! I noticed the same thing. And even among the friends who stayed COVID cautious, it just became another one of the excuses they used to avoid me when I was at my sickest!

I know I've had a bad few years and the things I've been doing will eventually lead to something better, but it's hard to keep the hope alive. Especially when it feels so hard to make actually deep connections.

Same! At this point I'm like "Community? That thing were a group sells out the most vulnerable in exchange for their own comfort, then drives out anyone who acts too traumatized over what's happening?"

This makes perfect sense! Being credited properly is worlds different than choosing not to make your identity A Thing in passing interactions.

I relate - I shaved my head completely when I was bedbound and later grew it into a partly-shaved do I can to cut myself. I'm too tired to keep the shaved part looking neat, but I'm well enough to go out to get it done, so I want to get a softer pixie cut.

Eddie Izzard did a bit about pears being like this and I think about it all the time

www.youtube.com/watch?v=-PGP...

It's taken me time to realize that just as I consider it a red flag when transmascs hang out in groups with no transfemme friends and seemingly no awareness of or compassion for transfemme issues, it's also a red flag the other way around.

Thank you! I'm still kind of stressed but I'm on track, and feeling less awful today. I just sold out of some linocut prints so that's another task on my to-do list. One day at a time!

Thank you! I'm nervous about not having a relationship with anyone who knew me in early childhood, but I hope my own (weirdly good) memory will be enough. I definitely had a lot of traits to report.

Yup! I owe a lot to my parents paying for undergrad and having a partner with a stable job. It allows me to spend my limited energy developing my skills instead of scrounging for survival.

It's endlessly traumatizing! At least the silver lining is people who still mask in 2025 have made a conscious, long term choice about their values. As opposed to a few years ago, when so many people were flip flopping.

I'm no longer considering connections with anyone who goes to high risk events unmasked, regardless of their access to high quality testing. Of course it puts me on edge about my boundaries and disposability: they've already proven they're willing to sacrifice people like me for their fun.