It's from 2005, but The Onion is evergreen.

Isn't there a big SIGINT risk? With SpaceX cooperation, FISA warrant, or unencrypted time of flight info you get the location of all boats. Then filter: Multiple points give track+speed. Stochastic Tx limits points but increases characterization, etc. Still too hard to interdict due to low profile?

Just wanted to get that out there before the inevitable fake fallout maps start appearing; which has practically become an internet tradition since Fukushima Daiichi in 2011.

(TS, SCI, NOFORN) 👊 🇺🇸 🔥

They've also done it on their article honoring baseball legend and WWII vet Jackie Robinson, the first black player in MLB. But not on the very next article in the series honoring Ty Cobb who was white.

Jackie Robinson: www.defense.gov/News/Feature...

Ty Cobb: www.defense.gov/News/Feature...