Your favorite godless duo kicks off a new arc by shoving Genesis back under the microscope—then gleefully coloring outside the canonical lines. We define Apocrypha (the “hidden/secret” stuff) and Pseudepigrapha (the “falsely attributed” stuff) before diving into why so much juicy lore lives outside the official cut. Think origin-story patch notes: second-Temple authors, bonus angels, Satan cameos, and the ultimate “deleted scenes” energy. (Also, yes, someone says they’re never reading the Old Testament again. Mood.) From there, we zoom into Genesis 1–11—creation, exile, murder, flood, and that adorable language-collapse at Babel—and tee up the apocryphal expansions that try to make the whiplash timelines…you know, make sense. Enter The Life of Adam and Eve (aka the Apocalypse of Moses) with grief, fasting, angelic burials, and Eve’s own post-Eden testimony; plus the hosts call it what it is: Bible fan fiction—and they mean that as a compliment. Then it’s a roll call for the “extras” you were never taught: 1 Enoch / 2 Enoch, Testaments of the Twelve Patriarchs, and the sprawling Book of Jubilees that basically retells Genesis and chunks of Exodus—because of course it does. Strap in; we’re mapping the timeline, roasting the canon, and promising to actually read some of these wild texts next. Listen now, bring your rage, and bring a friend. 👉 Listen now at sacrilegiousdiscourse.com 👉 Join our godless rebellion on Discord: discord.gg/VBnyTYV6nC 👉 Support the snark on Patreon: patreon.com/sacrilegiousdiscourse 📌 Topics Covered: * Apocrypha vs. Pseudepigrapha—what’s “hidden,” what’s “faked,” and why it matters * Genesis 1–11 speedrun: creation, exile, Cain & Abel, the Flood, Babel * The Life of Adam and Eve (Apocalypse of Moses)—Eve’s POV, angel funerals, cosmic guilt * Why Enoch keeps showing up in everyone’s theology like a mysterious uncle with visions * Jubilees and Testaments of the Twelve Patriarchs—when ancient editors couldn’t stop “fixing” Genesis * The hosts’ thesis: apocrypha = context, color, and all the inconvenient bits your pastor glossed over 💬 Best Quote from the Episode:“I will fucking never read the Old Testament ever again.”  --- Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We pick up where things got gloriously unhinged: Eve gives birth and the kid stands up and sprints off like the Gingerbread Man. Yes, still canon in this wild text. From there, the hosts unpack why the scene mentions “twelve angels and two virtues” (no, not moral traits—an angelic rank), then riff on hierarchy, bowing, and celestial office politics. It’s irreverent, nerdy, and exactly the kind of Pseudepigrapha detour we live for. Adam then launches into a sweeping prophecy dump—Temple, dispersion, rinse, repeat—while Michael taps the water with a rod and freezes it like he’s cosplaying Elsa to shuttle Adam around. Meanwhile, Seth volunteers to go beg at the Garden gate for fruit (again), and the roomful of Adam’s descendants—25,000 men—collectively struggle with the concept of… pain. (“What is pain, Father? I am ignorant.” Same, buddy.) Along the way, the hosts call out the text’s women-are-the-problem vibe, the backfilled “prophecies,” and the sheer comedy of a thousand-year-old patriarch lecturing his gigantically multiplied brood about mortality while they propose “get more forbidden fruit” as a pain management plan. Peak Bible logic. 👉 Listen now at sacrilegiousdiscourse.com 👉 Join our godless rebellion on Discord: discord.gg/VBnyTYV6nC 👉 Support the snark on Patreon: patreon.com/sacrilegiousdiscourse 📌 Topics Covered: * Sprinting baby Cain hands Mom a blade of grass—because sure, why not. * What “virtues” actually are (angel ranks, not good habits). * Michael’s freeze-spell water bridge and Adam’s prophecy monologue. * 25,000 sons assemble; still no one knows what pain is. * Seth’s “uh, want me to get forbidden fruit again?” plan. * The text’s misogyny and the hosts’ eye-rolls at angelic chain-of-command. 💬 Best Quote from the Episode: “Remember she had the baby and it got up and ran away.” --- Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.