schwartzmatt81.bsky.social
@schwartzmatt81.bsky.social
But when the lights are turning 'round
And wheels are rolling on the ground
That day I'll burn this whole place down
When the circus comes to town
And wheels are rolling on the ground
That day I'll burn this whole place down
When the circus comes to town
Walking into the dealership, “who wants to sell me a penis car?!”
December 18, 2025 at 10:25 PM
Walking into the dealership, “who wants to sell me a penis car?!”
I think this could work. Every ~500 feet you start a new diamond with another game.
December 18, 2025 at 12:35 AM
I think this could work. Every ~500 feet you start a new diamond with another game.
My wife says that she can only be married to me because she considers me a lesbian, so compliment.
December 17, 2025 at 10:02 PM
My wife says that she can only be married to me because she considers me a lesbian, so compliment.
I was pretty young, mid 20’s, and I’ll never forget it. He told me that he spent his whole life learning to do what he did and that’s what made him valuable at work.
December 17, 2025 at 2:25 PM
I was pretty young, mid 20’s, and I’ll never forget it. He told me that he spent his whole life learning to do what he did and that’s what made him valuable at work.
I used to work with a drywall finisher, who once took a call and said, “write your question down, send it, a stamped envelope, and $50 to me. I’ll answer in writing when I receive that.”
December 17, 2025 at 2:00 PM
I used to work with a drywall finisher, who once took a call and said, “write your question down, send it, a stamped envelope, and $50 to me. I’ll answer in writing when I receive that.”
I count 4 Cubsish champions
December 17, 2025 at 1:38 PM
I count 4 Cubsish champions
OKC will have to make some tough choices eventually. The only thing thing stopping the Dodgers is the new CBA fight
December 16, 2025 at 9:42 PM
OKC will have to make some tough choices eventually. The only thing thing stopping the Dodgers is the new CBA fight
My 8 year old has not seen the bus on time once this year. Morning or afternoon.
December 16, 2025 at 6:07 PM
My 8 year old has not seen the bus on time once this year. Morning or afternoon.
Nothing to make you feel safe, like a bunch of creepy armed guys hanging around outside the ladies room
December 15, 2025 at 11:54 PM
Nothing to make you feel safe, like a bunch of creepy armed guys hanging around outside the ladies room
None of the principals here are victims
December 13, 2025 at 9:32 PM
None of the principals here are victims
Real mystery
December 11, 2025 at 1:46 AM
Real mystery
Maybe Dem leadership just needs to get a “presidential sticker chart” and they could give him little gold stars.
December 10, 2025 at 8:50 PM
Maybe Dem leadership just needs to get a “presidential sticker chart” and they could give him little gold stars.
He could also be “detained” for failing the Peter Griffin color chart, so?
December 10, 2025 at 12:05 AM
He could also be “detained” for failing the Peter Griffin color chart, so?
No, but if some bribe money landed in my account, I could reconsider
December 9, 2025 at 11:54 PM
No, but if some bribe money landed in my account, I could reconsider
The poor dog
December 9, 2025 at 11:29 PM
The poor dog
It’s not over till someone goes down!
December 9, 2025 at 1:47 AM
It’s not over till someone goes down!
Casually explaining to his kid that it’s for work
December 8, 2025 at 12:17 PM
Casually explaining to his kid that it’s for work