Schwarziest (fuck Trump edition)
@schwarziest.bsky.social
I spew nonsense about cats, sports (especially #WNBA, #Skytown, #Cubs, #Illini), music, how much I hate maga, and random crap.
"Truth be told, I want to live my life with the volume full."
"Truth be told, I want to live my life with the volume full."
Pinned
Made this years ago. Never imagined it would be relevant again for another 4 years.
[Extreme Green Day voice] 🎶 Wake me up, when this asshole ends. 🎶
Every part of this is bonkers. The intro is bonkers. The transition to his health is bonkers. The mention that other presidents didn't need cognitive exams is bonkers. The claim that this screening test is somehow hard is bonkers. The idea that criticism of him is treason is bonkers. All of it.
December 10, 2025 at 1:01 PM
[Extreme Green Day voice] 🎶 Wake me up, when this asshole ends. 🎶
I got my bedroom heater fixed yesterday and it's made a huge difference in my entire house. It no longer arctic-ish in here.
December 10, 2025 at 3:01 AM
I got my bedroom heater fixed yesterday and it's made a huge difference in my entire house. It no longer arctic-ish in here.
I accidentally watched a few seconds of the Kevin Costner Christmas show on ABC and I have to ask, who asked for this?
December 10, 2025 at 2:50 AM
I accidentally watched a few seconds of the Kevin Costner Christmas show on ABC and I have to ask, who asked for this?
No no no no no don't settle for 3s goddammit!
December 10, 2025 at 2:35 AM
No no no no no don't settle for 3s goddammit!
I'm less cranky now that I've inhaled some spicy Pad Kee Mao from my local Thai place. But I still want OSU to suffer embarrassments galore.
December 10, 2025 at 2:23 AM
I'm less cranky now that I've inhaled some spicy Pad Kee Mao from my local Thai place. But I still want OSU to suffer embarrassments galore.
BTW I DGAF about Notre Dame and its football team's hissy fit. Stop emailing me about it, @chicagotribune.com.
December 10, 2025 at 1:16 AM
BTW I DGAF about Notre Dame and its football team's hissy fit. Stop emailing me about it, @chicagotribune.com.
Don't text me at almost 7 pm and act like an asshole because I'm not still in the office. Especially don't do this when you haven't met your obligations to me that I've been asking you about for over a week. GTFOH.
December 10, 2025 at 1:02 AM
Don't text me at almost 7 pm and act like an asshole because I'm not still in the office. Especially don't do this when you haven't met your obligations to me that I've been asking you about for over a week. GTFOH.
Stupid racist says what?
Stephen Miller: "If you subtract immigration out of test scores, all of the sudden our test scores skyrocket"
December 9, 2025 at 11:53 PM
Stupid racist says what?
I repeat: broadcasting your sporting events solely on stupid streaming platforms is stupid and does not grow your fanbase.
December 9, 2025 at 11:52 PM
I repeat: broadcasting your sporting events solely on stupid streaming platforms is stupid and does not grow your fanbase.
I yelled NOOOOOO and all the cats went running.
December 8, 2025 at 12:25 AM
I yelled NOOOOOO and all the cats went running.
Razors pain you
Rivers are damp
Acid stains you
And drugs cause cramp
Guns aren't lawful
Nooses give
Gas smells awful
Might as well live
Rivers are damp
Acid stains you
And drugs cause cramp
Guns aren't lawful
Nooses give
Gas smells awful
Might as well live
Which lines of poetry live rent-free in your head?
December 7, 2025 at 9:56 AM
Razors pain you
Rivers are damp
Acid stains you
And drugs cause cramp
Guns aren't lawful
Nooses give
Gas smells awful
Might as well live
Rivers are damp
Acid stains you
And drugs cause cramp
Guns aren't lawful
Nooses give
Gas smells awful
Might as well live
I, personally, am drunj at the bar playing Prince songs.
It's 2 a.m. do you know where your degenerate friends are?
December 7, 2025 at 8:24 AM
I, personally, am drunj at the bar playing Prince songs.
It's 2 a.m. do you know where your degenerate friends are?
December 7, 2025 at 8:06 AM
It's 2 a.m. do you know where your degenerate friends are?
There's copaganda on the TV at the bar at 1:15 a.m. in case you were wondering how prevalent it is in this stupid country.
December 7, 2025 at 7:18 AM
There's copaganda on the TV at the bar at 1:15 a.m. in case you were wondering how prevalent it is in this stupid country.
Picture of the staff who operate my bluesky account ...
December 7, 2025 at 5:51 AM
Picture of the staff who operate my bluesky account ...
I'm hearing rumors of a big football contest tomorrow in Green Bay. People are saying it's time to #BearDown and "crush the Packers." BIG, if true.
December 7, 2025 at 5:38 AM
I'm hearing rumors of a big football contest tomorrow in Green Bay. People are saying it's time to #BearDown and "crush the Packers." BIG, if true.
I just played a bunch of songs at the wrong bar. I swear I'm not drunk!
December 7, 2025 at 5:14 AM
I just played a bunch of songs at the wrong bar. I swear I'm not drunk!
More like Suckeyes if you ask me.
December 7, 2025 at 4:32 AM
More like Suckeyes if you ask me.
Eat shit, THE Ohio State University.
December 7, 2025 at 4:25 AM
Eat shit, THE Ohio State University.