Why does the last three weeks just feel like it’s been an absolute slog of discomfort and various types of pain? I’d been doing better, figuring things out and making some progress on the path out of burnout. Getting past the holiday craziness was supposed to improve things.

So maybe what you offer, what you think about, what you can do well-- maybe brilliantly-- isn't what the people who raised you valued or were even capable of seeing. That DOESN'T mean you lack value or potential. It means you need to find your people & place.

No more; no less.

Whenever someone remarks that any given bird 'looks like a dinosaur,' I need you to understand the monumental restraint it requires for me not to immediately reply like a smartypants with 'that's because it _is_ one.'

For CPTSD survivors who have been gaslit & coerced, it's not as easy as "just trust yourself." It's not a simple, one time "decision." We're unwinding years of programming here-- & remember, the damage CPTSD inflicts is physical, not just mental.

Give yourself time.

The fact that there may not be anyone to straightforwardly blame for the pain or instability in our early life does not mean we don't get to acknowledge or resent the chaos we experienced.

"Fault" may be complicated-- & we STILL get to be angry, sad, or hurt.

Certain sudden, significant, or traumatic losses can make everything (& everyone) we previously knew & depended on suddenly seem unfamiliar, cold, or unhelpful.

We often don't realize how central a person or pet was to our coherent relationship w/ reality until we lose them.

Nobody who's not in your head or in your skin understands how hard you're working to stay alive & "functional." Do not take sh*t about your life, appearance, body, career, symptoms, or anything else, from someone who by definition doesn't know what the f*ck they're talking about.

This is my BIGGEST struggle as an Autistic person. 😭

'You're adopted'

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(For the non-palaeo folks, this is in light of a newly published paper re-establishing that #Nanotyrannus, previously understood to be a juvenile #T.rex, is indeed its own genus after all.)

There is nothing happening in the world today worth abandoning your trauma or addiction recovery over.

The rubber meets the road in recovery when intolerable sh*t happens. Feel what you feel- but don't get tricked into harming or abandoning yourself today.

We need to remember that because our entire emotional or physical state doesn't change dramatically the moment we use a coping tool, doesn't mean the tool doesn't work. Shifting our emotional & physical state requires consistency & momentum. We gotta be realistic w/ expectations.

Abusive people & institutions will try to mind f*ck you by throwing all sorts of shade & judgment your way for not being able to do a thing-- while at the same time withholding the tools & support & resources you'd need to do the thing.

Once you see it, you can't unsee it.

You need to know that your motivation in trauma recovery is gonna fluctuate. It doesn't mean you don't "really" want to recover-- it means you've been insufficiently resourced & supported in the past, & your nervous system is ambivalent about committing to hope.

Easy does it.