They owned an ‘38 Oldsmobile. Ralphie says “Some men are Catholics, others Baptist. My father was an Oldsmobile man.”

I mean to be fair, that is a four sentence paragraph that contains sixteen commas. Twelve in one sentence alone. “Being able to write well” seems to have gone out the window.

My brain had a brief moment there thinking “where was Macaulay Culkin in Goodfellas?”

It’s even more vile than that. He’s implying that the Black female mayor of DC was involved. Because surely his cult and sycophants won’t make anything out of that implication.

“Nor have his lawyers who at times have approached the line, but never crossed it.”

Doesn’t that undermine his previous two sentences that defying a court order has never been suggested?

Wouldn’t approaching the line imply they are suggesting crossing it?

Oh man it really is the 1850s again. We’re even getting the Know Nothings back!!

“Making Wall Streeters walk out on the ice in the East River”…..someone just saw The Dark Knight Rises recently and thought he had found a great reference there

“Thank you for your attention to this matter” is his written form of “sir” stories as a tell for his lies….outside of the normal tell of saying anything at all.

There was a twin consultant. That was the detail in the credits that got me. That in addition to having a hoodoo consultant, they had someone to consult about twins.

Chapel Bill (Bill’s Version) is killing me, though.

Shorter Durbin: “He is testing our system of checks and balances, so as a member of a supposed co-equal branch, I decided I would neither check nor balance him.” What an absolute fucking joke

Gavin Newsom to his PR team