Knives are always going to be sharper or duller than you expect, but never in the way you want them to be.

I hate it when people tweak their post to say B*ltway Br*an because that bypasses my filter. Now I am forced to have both a BeltwayBrian and a BypassingBeltwayBrian filter.

I was going to send this to you directly, as this may... just perchance... be your fuckin' jam.

Oh wow, this is going to be one crazy week I guess?

Oh hey our Idiot drinks like that too! I worried about him being dehydrated, but he's fine. It just takes him a while to finish.

But Gretchen, we've always been dusting the blinds. The blinds are forever dusty. Stay a while with the blinds. Is one slightly bent or is all of reality bent?

While trying to solve a problem cause by trying to solve a problem caused by a dumb joke, I think I found a really good business name and website URL.