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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 11h

Oh!

Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 1d

Classical musicians, especially opera people: what's a recording, particular piece or work, musical phrase, even an essay that is so effective or good or evocative that it makes you feel like it HAS to exist

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 2d

The grammar here doesn't entirely make sense because I'm still mentally eating my perfect cinnamon rolls

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 2d

I made cinnamon rolls from scratch and they are so easily the very best cinnamon rolls I, a self proclaimed cinnamon roll snob, have ever had in my life as to be a religious experience.

An absolutely perfect cinnamon roll, partly broken apart, on a white plate with a fork across the top

A whole cinnamon roll and the center of another one next to each other on a white plate with a fork

Two frosted cinnamon rolls on a small blue plate with a fork

A truly perfect, ideal cinnamon roll on a small blue plate with a spatula on the edge

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 9d

Got second place in the stein holding contest at the ren fest today (and the guy who won was cheating) if anyone is looking for a hottie with very strong shoulders

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 14d

Told my coworkers about fat bear week and they barely cared, life is a prison

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 15d

Maybe I am simply ignorant but I did not realize "throwing shade" was "common parlance in Jane Austen's time" old

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 15d

Hey just in case you guys weren't aware leucovorin is part of a couple widely used chemo regimens. So is saline, so I'm not saying it's like automatically evil because of that, but uh. That is its current most common use and we sure don’t need shortages of it

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 18d

It is also my mom's birthday and she is an angel. She doesn't deserve this

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 18d

There is no greater loss than the one I am experiencing, the loss of my birthday to some fuckin jackass

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 18d

One thing I think we need to remember in all of this is that despite the fact that my birthday is apparently the same as fucking Charlie Kirk's, I am younger and more beautiful and also not dead

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 19d

Okay I have to amend the alt text. I didn't zoom in on the top right picture and now that I have I can see that it is not anything for monitoring and it is in fact a neck IV lmfao

Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

Need more input from you guys!!!!!!!

Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

Yes! That was what inspired me to put the tomato prediction on!

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

They saw what happened with cucumbers last summer and wanted a piece of the action!!!

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

Time for a game of DOES IT COUNT where I say why I think something that didn't happen exactly should count and you tell me if you agree or not

1) Republican in a guest spot etc -- The guy on Fox who had to apologize for saying homeless people should all be killed had to apologize. Wrong network but I feel the spirit is there?
2) Extremely successful for me -- I made a huge move and am happier and have a better job that pays me like 20% more and a voice teacher I like and new coaches who are fantastic but I haven't had the kinds of successes I had in mind when I wrote that?
3 ) Idina Menzel limited return-- she did have a limited return to Broadway in Redwood but it wasn't necessarily intended to be limited and it was definitely more than 3 nights
4 ) Euphoria delayed -- there haven't been announcements that it was delayed necessarily but they're saying it's releasing like a whole entire extra year further than we thought it would
5 ) Costco guys -- not cancelled, just fell off and eclipsed by the Rizzler

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

Choosing also to count the tomato recipe trend because although I am not aware of a tomato RECIPE being trendy this summer, it has absolutely been a tomato summer. Bath and Body Works has a whole tomato girl summer line out, I say it counts

My 2025 predictions list, detailed in quoted post. "Some kind of tomato recipe trend in the summer" is checked off in blue

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

Can’t believe I got this one honestly (hope she's okay)

Tweet from Pop Crave
"Bella Hadid shares new photos:

'I'm sorry I always go MIA I love you guys'"

There are 4 photos of Bella Hadid in various hospital scenarios. Top left with an IV catheter in her hand and some sort of monitoring devices around her head. Top right with a small scrape above her eyebrow and a visibly swollen opposite eye. Bottom left lying in a hospital bed with an oxygen mask on and IV in her arm. Bottom right making a sort of duck face lying in a hospital bed.

Second half of my 2025 predictions list, detailed in original post
"A Hadid hospitalized" is checked off in blue

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · Apr 4

Chat does this count
I think it's close enough, it made some freak type "ORAL S*X"

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · Mar 12

Okay so I will obviously not be taking such a jubilant tone while checking this one off but... we do have another one folks

The second half of my 2025 predictions list (detailed fully in the alt text of original post). "Someone dies stuck in their Tesla" is checked off in blue and highlighted in yellow.

News article from SFist.com. The headline reads "Testimony Reveals Doors Would Not Open on Cybertruck That Caught Fire in Piedmont, Killing Three." The accompanying image is of a Tesla Cybertruck that is missing its doors, roof, windshield, and hood panel. The inner workings of the front are thusly exposed. A small portion of the windshield remains, though clearly shattered. There is an evidence or impound lot sticker on the front bumper.

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · Mar 4

BACK TO BACK BABY LET'S GOOOOOOO

Some of my 2025 predictions (detailed in alt text of the quoted post). "AI used by a major news organization does something extremely embarrassing for them and is quietly disabled" is highlighted and checked off in blue

From The Daily Beast
"The 'Los Angeles Times' has removed its new AI-powered 'insights' feature from a column after the tool tried to defend the Ku Klux Klan"
An image of the newspaper's owner is underneath the text. He is holding a very thin microphone.

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

bsky.app/profile/seco...

Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · Mar 4

I knew if I held out for something more old timey than measles I could get this checked off cleanly (really sad though Jesus Christ)

www.koin.com/news/oregon/...

My predictions (detailed in quoted post) but "crazy surge in an already existing bit heretofore rare and often deadly illness" is highlighted and checked off

Screenshot of a news headline that reads "Dysentery cases rise in Portland metro area, health department reports" from KOIN news

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

Going to threading these here because the year is almost over and we need an easy way to keep track of my successes

Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · Feb 13

Genuinely sad about this one for obvious reasons

"RFK confirmed" is now checked off. This fuckin sucks dude

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

That's the fun of it!

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Jess @secondaryjess.bsky.social · 20d

Choosing also to count the tomato recipe trend because although I am not aware of a tomato RECIPE being trendy this summer, it has absolutely been a tomato summer. Bath and Body Works has a whole tomato girl summer line out, I say it counts

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