Senile Don Draper
banner
seniledondraper.bsky.social
Senile Don Draper
@seniledondraper.bsky.social
Best ad man in the business for 65 years. Best ad man in the business for 65 years. Writing from the most impressive pillow fort on Madison Avenue. Peggy how do you close this goddamn thi
Tough times make hard men.
Hard men make good times.
Cialis.
July 19, 2025 at 2:31 PM
Michelob Ultra. Don’t feed it after midnight.
June 28, 2025 at 1:04 AM
Michelob Ultra. If you hit one with a hammer it turns into a six pack of Hamms.
June 28, 2025 at 1:03 AM
Michelob Ultra. A beer for people who only get found after the snow thaws.
June 28, 2025 at 1:02 AM
Michelob Ultra. It’s You can’t spell “a rat taint” without “ultra.”
June 28, 2025 at 1:01 AM
Michelob Ultra. Think of a beer. Because that’s as close as you’re getting to one tonight.
June 28, 2025 at 12:57 AM
Hormel®. What is it? That's the Hormel® question. Get a full sack of Hormel® today.
May 2, 2025 at 12:31 AM
It's all over, America. We've finally made a potato chip that you can fuck.
May 2, 2025 at 12:30 AM
I only watch commercials for the Super Bowl.
May 1, 2025 at 2:18 PM
At Verizon, we hate you.

Verizon. The only fully integrated 7G whatever-the-fuck.

The only phones with that perfect Verizon crunch. Verizon.

"Verizon." Say it three times in a mirror and Candyman comes.

more pitching less bitching, Peggy, there are no bad ideas
May 1, 2025 at 11:54 AM
Heineken. The Heineken of beers.
April 13, 2025 at 12:58 PM
Dunkin’ Donuts. We took the “ugh” out of “doughnut” and put it into your coffee.
March 10, 2025 at 6:31 PM
Firestone. You can’t eat just one.
February 18, 2025 at 3:09 PM
Inside you are two wolves. Both want a Pepsi®.
February 16, 2025 at 2:31 PM
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.

You can get everything from guns to shovels ... at Walmart.
February 16, 2025 at 1:15 PM
Fudge. It’s like chocolate for idiots and schoolchildren. Paid for by the American Fudge Farmers of America.
February 15, 2025 at 1:24 AM
This Superbowl, give her the gift she's been waiting for: a car made of cheeseburgers, paid for with an AI-managed crypto featuring Snoop Dogg

Superbowl: America her so good.
February 10, 2025 at 12:15 PM
What brings us all together is greater than what divides us. Soylant Green. Bringing everyone together.
February 10, 2025 at 12:12 PM
There's nothing like the crisp refreshing taste of Valvoline.

Valvoline. On the road of life, there are drivers and there are drinkers ... of Valvoline.

Valvoline. You can't drink just one.

Peggy what is this product. It tatses like Pete's hair smells
February 3, 2025 at 10:55 AM
If you give a million monkeys a million typewriters, eventually they’ll eat your eyes right out of your head. That’s what Red Bull is like.
January 31, 2025 at 2:28 AM
Anghkooey when a demon in a yellow suit convinced you to sacrifice your children to gain immortality?

Pepperidge Farm Anghkooeys
January 31, 2025 at 2:25 AM
Coors Extra Gold. The beer that says what the fuck.
January 27, 2025 at 10:32 PM
Valvoline: the motor oil with the taste of energy drinks. Or wait— is it the energy drink with the taste of motor oil?

Peggy get me Red Bull on the line to straighten this out
January 27, 2025 at 10:30 PM
Taco Bell. Imagine a bell full of something we'll call 'meat.' Now imagine that bell is what's left of your intestines.
January 26, 2025 at 4:49 PM
Pfizer. The name you trust when you need to get pfucked up on pfills.
January 19, 2025 at 10:58 AM