My relationship is slowly changing for the better. It's still not where I want it but it does feel like it's getting somewhere. Weirdly enough I'm actually slowly becoming scared of any form of sexual intimacy with them all because of a convo we had once we moved in. Self-esteem in that area is low.

Today has been a good day for the most part. Still some parts of my life are suboptimal. I know things will change soon but I just hope it's for the better.

I miss what my relationship used to be. Plenty of honest and meaningful talks going into the late night until we fall asleep. Actually having a layer of intimacy greater than surface level. Spending enjoyable quality time. Now it's just the bare minimum and feels surface level ever.

Either I made a mistake smoking cannabis again or the level of clarity I achieved put a lot of my problems into perspective. The only issue is I now have harder decisions to make and maybe a few that are too important to let a high guide me through.

Really excited to get back into guilty gear strive! Just need a new chair. Old one is gone. Sadly...

New desk yo!!!