B-O-R-E-D
@spelledbored.bsky.social
You wouldn’t yell at a potato
Ok where, PRECISELY, do you stab someone in the back so they do that thing where they walk to people they know and then fall over dead so they can see the knife in their back? I’ve tried like a dozen times and it’s not like that at all
October 7, 2025 at 6:33 PM
Ok where, PRECISELY, do you stab someone in the back so they do that thing where they walk to people they know and then fall over dead so they can see the knife in their back? I’ve tried like a dozen times and it’s not like that at all
we can argue later about whether i gave my son’s jv football team food poisoning on purpose, officer, the right-now problem is draftkings wont let me bet on the game. like it doesnt even have a page for it
September 30, 2025 at 4:14 AM
we can argue later about whether i gave my son’s jv football team food poisoning on purpose, officer, the right-now problem is draftkings wont let me bet on the game. like it doesnt even have a page for it
how to run train on your dragon
July 25, 2025 at 6:39 PM
how to run train on your dragon
Swatted a fly and it moaned a little???
July 22, 2025 at 9:20 PM
Swatted a fly and it moaned a little???
Dead last in the library coloring contest at 44 years old
July 15, 2025 at 5:31 PM
Dead last in the library coloring contest at 44 years old
Murder can and should count as a little treat
July 14, 2025 at 5:48 PM
Murder can and should count as a little treat
accepting free kicks to the sinus cavity
July 9, 2025 at 7:41 PM
accepting free kicks to the sinus cavity
Being a parent doesn’t mean you can’t be cool anymore, you just have to give your children cigarettes
July 8, 2025 at 9:39 PM
Being a parent doesn’t mean you can’t be cool anymore, you just have to give your children cigarettes
“headbutt” deserves a better definition
July 7, 2025 at 9:00 PM
“headbutt” deserves a better definition
if you have a picture of jesus with his eyes open in your bedroom and he doesn’t use his jesus miracle powers to close his eyes the first time you crank one out, it means conclusively he not only approves, he’s probably into it
June 19, 2025 at 12:00 AM
if you have a picture of jesus with his eyes open in your bedroom and he doesn’t use his jesus miracle powers to close his eyes the first time you crank one out, it means conclusively he not only approves, he’s probably into it
a.i. will never be cool until it can bring me weed
June 18, 2025 at 11:16 PM
a.i. will never be cool until it can bring me weed
i expected some static for wearing a crotchless tuxedo on casual friday. i did not expect the sellouts at the aclu to refuse my wrongful termination case
June 6, 2025 at 7:01 PM
i expected some static for wearing a crotchless tuxedo on casual friday. i did not expect the sellouts at the aclu to refuse my wrongful termination case
iiiii’m gonna kill ted danson at the PINK! PONY! CLUB!
May 21, 2025 at 6:09 PM
iiiii’m gonna kill ted danson at the PINK! PONY! CLUB!
as a mother of fuck,
April 12, 2025 at 6:15 PM
as a mother of fuck,
i scream
you scream
we all scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
jesus christ robert
you scream
we all scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
jesus christ robert
March 8, 2025 at 5:07 AM
i scream
you scream
we all scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
jesus christ robert
you scream
we all scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
you scream
jesus christ robert
if you say you’re building the dinosaurs a park and then not giving them one single rocket slide or merry-go-round then honestly the dinosaurs aren’t to blame for whatever happens next
February 22, 2025 at 6:57 AM
if you say you’re building the dinosaurs a park and then not giving them one single rocket slide or merry-go-round then honestly the dinosaurs aren’t to blame for whatever happens next
one of the most difficult things about adulthood is discovering that if you drop a piano on something it only sounds like a wood box breaking, because that’s what it is. and if you drop it on someONE they dont pop their head out with piano keys where their teeth were
February 20, 2025 at 5:36 PM
one of the most difficult things about adulthood is discovering that if you drop a piano on something it only sounds like a wood box breaking, because that’s what it is. and if you drop it on someONE they dont pop their head out with piano keys where their teeth were
lobsters are ancient space aliens whose invasion plan didn’t take into account how much we’d enjoy eating them
February 16, 2025 at 11:20 AM
lobsters are ancient space aliens whose invasion plan didn’t take into account how much we’d enjoy eating them
imagine having to put together the yearbook for the high school in final destination
February 11, 2025 at 4:35 AM
imagine having to put together the yearbook for the high school in final destination
the word ‘unique’ is but one of thousands in the english language
February 7, 2025 at 8:55 AM
the word ‘unique’ is but one of thousands in the english language
a cryptid cover band called sasquatch 20
February 5, 2025 at 6:55 AM
a cryptid cover band called sasquatch 20