I was picturing it happening roughly like this:
January 12, 2026 at 10:28 PM
I was picturing it happening roughly like this:
I just introduced a bill authorizing me to annex this guy's house. It's vital for national security.
January 12, 2026 at 10:18 PM
I just introduced a bill authorizing me to annex this guy's house. It's vital for national security.
"Actually giving people their money back after I scammed them? That's usually the part where I declare bankruptcy and run away!"
January 12, 2026 at 7:55 PM
"Actually giving people their money back after I scammed them? That's usually the part where I declare bankruptcy and run away!"
Don't you guys have, like, courts or something in the US? Who could, you know, adjudicate who's the deranged lunatic in this scenario and who gets to shoot who in the head three times? Asking for a NATO ally.
January 12, 2026 at 7:33 PM
Don't you guys have, like, courts or something in the US? Who could, you know, adjudicate who's the deranged lunatic in this scenario and who gets to shoot who in the head three times? Asking for a NATO ally.
I dunno man, I heard those people in Tehran were being EXTREMELY disrespectful of government law enforcement officers.
January 12, 2026 at 7:26 PM
I dunno man, I heard those people in Tehran were being EXTREMELY disrespectful of government law enforcement officers.
Glad to see Diarrhea Forever finally losing a tiny bit of ground to Everyone Gets a Puppy in the US. Sure took a LOT of diarrhea though...
January 12, 2026 at 7:23 PM
Glad to see Diarrhea Forever finally losing a tiny bit of ground to Everyone Gets a Puppy in the US. Sure took a LOT of diarrhea though...
Silly Leavitt! American citizens are protesting because they DO want heinous murderers and rapists and criminals to be removed from their city. Didn't she see the 'ICE out now' signs?
January 12, 2026 at 7:15 PM
Silly Leavitt! American citizens are protesting because they DO want heinous murderers and rapists and criminals to be removed from their city. Didn't she see the 'ICE out now' signs?
It feels like he's fully expecting NATO to simply roll over on this without the need for an actual invasion, so long as he pretends he's serious and doesn't care about the consequences. Miller also clearly thought we wouldn't put up a fight. And Leavit seems to be in on the "joke."
January 12, 2026 at 8:13 AM
It feels like he's fully expecting NATO to simply roll over on this without the need for an actual invasion, so long as he pretends he's serious and doesn't care about the consequences. Miller also clearly thought we wouldn't put up a fight. And Leavit seems to be in on the "joke."
"Which is why we're sending even more heavily-armed law enforcement into a similar, ever-worsening position."
January 12, 2026 at 7:55 AM
"Which is why we're sending even more heavily-armed law enforcement into a similar, ever-worsening position."
If people like Homan suddenly want to de-escalate, the growing protests must've gotten them worried.
January 11, 2026 at 3:23 PM
If people like Homan suddenly want to de-escalate, the growing protests must've gotten them worried.
Much like the old-school nazi's wanted advance notice before the Red Cross was allowed to visit the Theresienstadt ghetto.
January 11, 2026 at 9:13 AM
Much like the old-school nazi's wanted advance notice before the Red Cross was allowed to visit the Theresienstadt ghetto.
He's probably worried the results of his deadly vaccine policies are going to look even worse when compared to the rest of the western world, if they don't follow suit.
January 10, 2026 at 5:03 PM
He's probably worried the results of his deadly vaccine policies are going to look even worse when compared to the rest of the western world, if they don't follow suit.
Putin would've come up with a 3-hour-long pseudo-historical speech listing all the bullshit reasons why he believes Greenland and its people fundamentally belonged to Russia, but this vacuous fuck just shrugs and goes: "Eh, doesn't really matter who owns what, right? We can just take it."
January 9, 2026 at 10:40 PM
Putin would've come up with a 3-hour-long pseudo-historical speech listing all the bullshit reasons why he believes Greenland and its people fundamentally belonged to Russia, but this vacuous fuck just shrugs and goes: "Eh, doesn't really matter who owns what, right? We can just take it."
This sounds like one of those Trump claims where none of the parties mentioned actually know or have agreed to any of this beforehand, so he's really just posting his demands and pretending they're already a reality. Basically daring anyone to contradict him.
January 7, 2026 at 7:38 AM
This sounds like one of those Trump claims where none of the parties mentioned actually know or have agreed to any of this beforehand, so he's really just posting his demands and pretending they're already a reality. Basically daring anyone to contradict him.
"For the Most Evil Invention in the World contest, I made a child-molesting robot."
January 5, 2026 at 12:55 PM
"For the Most Evil Invention in the World contest, I made a child-molesting robot."
War is hell... Wait, what's that Marco? Oh, sorry, I obviously meant to say: law enforcement operations are hell.
January 4, 2026 at 7:45 PM
War is hell... Wait, what's that Marco? Oh, sorry, I obviously meant to say: law enforcement operations are hell.
They're lucky no American soldiers died during the attack. Someone in the US government might've actually cared enough to actually do something otherwise.
January 4, 2026 at 7:22 PM
They're lucky no American soldiers died during the attack. Someone in the US government might've actually cared enough to actually do something otherwise.
"We might have to bomb them again though. So I guess they'll have to watch out for that."
January 4, 2026 at 7:00 PM
"We might have to bomb them again though. So I guess they'll have to watch out for that."
Don't you just love how consistent the Trump administration's messaging is on these matters?
January 4, 2026 at 6:51 PM
Don't you just love how consistent the Trump administration's messaging is on these matters?
Future Democratic president: "Legalize abortion or no money for you."
January 4, 2026 at 6:48 PM
Future Democratic president: "Legalize abortion or no money for you."
Also Marco Rubio, earlier this year: "No court in the United States has a right to conduct the foreign policy of the United States."
January 4, 2026 at 6:24 PM
Also Marco Rubio, earlier this year: "No court in the United States has a right to conduct the foreign policy of the United States."
“The rules are simple: they lie to us, we know they're lying, they know we know they're lying, but they keep lying to us, and we keep pretending to believe them.”
― Elena Gorokhova, A Mountain of Crumbs
― Elena Gorokhova, A Mountain of Crumbs
January 4, 2026 at 6:15 PM
“The rules are simple: they lie to us, we know they're lying, they know we know they're lying, but they keep lying to us, and we keep pretending to believe them.”
― Elena Gorokhova, A Mountain of Crumbs
― Elena Gorokhova, A Mountain of Crumbs
Americans should be racing to assemble anything resembling a functional governing structure in their own country.
January 4, 2026 at 9:34 AM
Americans should be racing to assemble anything resembling a functional governing structure in their own country.
"Sure we killed a bunch of people (in self-defense lmao), the plan leaked to the press beforehand, and we have no follow-up plan whatsoever, but it was a super-successful operation dawg! Look at how many cool planes we had flying around and blowing shit up at the same time!"
January 4, 2026 at 9:26 AM
"Sure we killed a bunch of people (in self-defense lmao), the plan leaked to the press beforehand, and we have no follow-up plan whatsoever, but it was a super-successful operation dawg! Look at how many cool planes we had flying around and blowing shit up at the same time!"