The worst part is the amount of time I'm going to have to waste in order to prove why that isn't enough time, and they're going to tell me to try and do it anyway, only now I have even less time.

We celebrated by going on an underground cave boat tour and having lunch at a Japanese restaurant.

I wanted to do a reel-to-reel setup, but it got too complicated for me.

I told him if it's too depressing he can just use it to count down to his birthday each year, since that's when the color changes happen.

This came in the mail today FROM MY OWN MOTHER! What in the world is going on?!

We always put lottery tickets in the kids' Christmas stockings, but in Tennessee lottery tickets have to be purchased with cash. Marty may have sighed like the parent of a teenager making a frivolous purchase with their hard-earned money, but I promised to pay him back.

*Amy March, obviously. Also, in searching for a suitable gif for this, AI tried to tell me untruths about the plot of the 1994 movie, which I've seen more times than I can count, and I am not having it. Steal our water and heat our planet, sure, but I have to draw the line somewhere.

I work so I can afford to travel, only I don't get enough days off work to take all the trips I'd like to. I don't even get enough time off to take the trips I don't want to take. (I'm looking at you, Idaho.) Basically, I am Any March saying "I want to go to the theatre. I never get to go anywhere."

My father-in-law casually mentioned he got to fly in the Goodyear blimp when he was a kid, and I a) have never been more jealous of anything in my life, and b) was like, how has this never come up before?! If I ever flew in a blimp it would be my go-to introduction anecdote.