@thaifoodmary666.bsky.social
Life is a movie and I am both the lead and the audience.
When my conservative coworkers ask what my political opinions are
a cartoon of a dragon with the words your worst nightmare below it
ALT: a cartoon of a dragon with the words your worst nightmare below it
media.tenor.com
January 5, 2026 at 4:37 PM
When my conservative coworkers ask what my political opinions are
I’ve never known what I’d do if I had a Time Machine (other than stand over baby Hitler’s cradle conflicted on the morals of killing a baby only to realize I’m not like him & leave him unharmed, of course) but I think I’d tell Shakespeare about the modern insult “ass hat.” I think he’d like that one
January 3, 2026 at 7:50 PM
I’ve never known what I’d do if I had a Time Machine (other than stand over baby Hitler’s cradle conflicted on the morals of killing a baby only to realize I’m not like him & leave him unharmed, of course) but I think I’d tell Shakespeare about the modern insult “ass hat.” I think he’d like that one
@truesunlight.com I’m still catching up on the show so apologies if this has been brought up already but does anyone feel like dick harpootlian timed out the release of his book & subsequent podcast tour to the release of the Hulu murdaugh show to try to distract from the fact that he defended Alex?
December 9, 2025 at 6:28 PM
@truesunlight.com I’m still catching up on the show so apologies if this has been brought up already but does anyone feel like dick harpootlian timed out the release of his book & subsequent podcast tour to the release of the Hulu murdaugh show to try to distract from the fact that he defended Alex?
Yo, what is happening. First @lpontheleft.bsky.social interviews the scumbag Dick Harpootlian, now Kate Winkler Dawson is interviewing him on Wicked Words? Do better, guys. This is disgusting. @exactlyright.bsky.social @mandy-matney.com @elizfarrell.com @truesunlight.com
December 8, 2025 at 2:43 PM
Yo, what is happening. First @lpontheleft.bsky.social interviews the scumbag Dick Harpootlian, now Kate Winkler Dawson is interviewing him on Wicked Words? Do better, guys. This is disgusting. @exactlyright.bsky.social @mandy-matney.com @elizfarrell.com @truesunlight.com
The Maureen Ponderosa Wedding Massacre episode of Always Sunny is Sinners if they were white
December 3, 2025 at 1:07 AM
The Maureen Ponderosa Wedding Massacre episode of Always Sunny is Sinners if they were white
I like how when I lived in LA & worked in the film industry I never felt creative/inspired bc all my energy was going towards working in the industry so I moved home & got a “normal” job & now I feel inspired but if I moved back to LA I won’t feel inspired bc I’d be working in the industry but if I
November 25, 2025 at 5:47 PM
I like how when I lived in LA & worked in the film industry I never felt creative/inspired bc all my energy was going towards working in the industry so I moved home & got a “normal” job & now I feel inspired but if I moved back to LA I won’t feel inspired bc I’d be working in the industry but if I
My personality is 90% the current TV show I’m watching and I’m currently watching Always Sunny, so apologies to my friends and family.
November 21, 2025 at 2:11 PM
My personality is 90% the current TV show I’m watching and I’m currently watching Always Sunny, so apologies to my friends and family.
I’ve learned, since being single, that having sex with yourself is almost exactly like having sex with a man, down to watching Always Sunny afterwards in the afterglow. The only difference is I actually orgasm.
November 18, 2025 at 4:55 AM
I’ve learned, since being single, that having sex with yourself is almost exactly like having sex with a man, down to watching Always Sunny afterwards in the afterglow. The only difference is I actually orgasm.
I can die happy Merv replied to my comment on Instagram 🥰
November 14, 2025 at 5:26 PM
I can die happy Merv replied to my comment on Instagram 🥰
Sometimes I fantasize about the kind of life my mom would have had if she’d aborted me
November 5, 2025 at 3:52 AM
Sometimes I fantasize about the kind of life my mom would have had if she’d aborted me
When do we get to the part where we drag them out of their palaces and behead them in the streets because I’m ready when everyone else is
November 4, 2025 at 3:53 PM
When do we get to the part where we drag them out of their palaces and behead them in the streets because I’m ready when everyone else is
There’s something beautiful about listening to Henry and eddie scream about sandwiches on @lpontheleft.bsky.social and I look up and see this. Is this a sign from the universe to donate to Unbelievably Friendly Organisms??
September 29, 2025 at 9:20 PM
There’s something beautiful about listening to Henry and eddie scream about sandwiches on @lpontheleft.bsky.social and I look up and see this. Is this a sign from the universe to donate to Unbelievably Friendly Organisms??
@rejectedjokes.bsky.social have you ever realized your name is Bench Warts?
September 22, 2025 at 2:42 AM
@rejectedjokes.bsky.social have you ever realized your name is Bench Warts?
So tickled they’re discussing Wisconsin dells on @lpontheleft.bsky.social . Fun fact: I am so Midwestern that my parents honeymooned in Wisconsin dells. I said what I said.
September 14, 2025 at 12:59 AM
So tickled they’re discussing Wisconsin dells on @lpontheleft.bsky.social . Fun fact: I am so Midwestern that my parents honeymooned in Wisconsin dells. I said what I said.
My best advice to the youth of today is to sing along to teenagers by my chemical romance at the absolute top of your lungs every chance you get while you’re still a teenager
August 21, 2025 at 12:58 PM
My best advice to the youth of today is to sing along to teenagers by my chemical romance at the absolute top of your lungs every chance you get while you’re still a teenager
@myfavoritemurder.bsky.social my favorite part of this week’s minisode is Georgia’s little pantsing sound effect: hehnh!
August 18, 2025 at 3:45 PM
@myfavoritemurder.bsky.social my favorite part of this week’s minisode is Georgia’s little pantsing sound effect: hehnh!
If I ever die in a catastrophe as hilarious as a molasses flood, you all have permission to laugh when you talk about it. @lpontheleft.bsky.social
August 1, 2025 at 5:49 PM
If I ever die in a catastrophe as hilarious as a molasses flood, you all have permission to laugh when you talk about it. @lpontheleft.bsky.social
@nspband.bsky.social I am BEGGING you to do a cover of maniac by Michael sombello 🙏🙏🙏🙏
July 21, 2025 at 2:47 PM
@nspband.bsky.social I am BEGGING you to do a cover of maniac by Michael sombello 🙏🙏🙏🙏
Yes yes learning Spanish in high school has helped me gain a greater appreciation for my mixing pot country and the world at large blah blah blah but honestly learning the words to La Bamba and being able to bring down the house at karaoke has been my favorite lesson from high school Spanish
July 8, 2025 at 1:20 PM
Yes yes learning Spanish in high school has helped me gain a greater appreciation for my mixing pot country and the world at large blah blah blah but honestly learning the words to La Bamba and being able to bring down the house at karaoke has been my favorite lesson from high school Spanish
Is it too much to ask for a bisexual socialist emotionally secure man
June 30, 2025 at 11:36 PM
Is it too much to ask for a bisexual socialist emotionally secure man
Not a man, not a woman, but a secret third thing (a cryptid)
June 28, 2025 at 10:34 PM
Not a man, not a woman, but a secret third thing (a cryptid)
Not a man, not a woman, but a secret third thing (a muppet)
June 26, 2025 at 2:12 AM
Not a man, not a woman, but a secret third thing (a muppet)
Not a man, not a woman, but a secret third thing (an eldritch horror)
June 25, 2025 at 1:31 PM
Not a man, not a woman, but a secret third thing (an eldritch horror)
@stephenking.bsky.social I feel like you’d like @nightvaleradio.bsky.social
June 15, 2025 at 4:10 PM
@stephenking.bsky.social I feel like you’d like @nightvaleradio.bsky.social
After a lifetime of being obsessed with true crime, I’ve found that 99% of “unexplained deaths” or “unexplained mysteries” can be explained by police corruption. The other 1% is Mothman. @myfavoritemurder.bsky.social @lpontheleft.bsky.social #crimejunkie
June 11, 2025 at 10:41 PM
After a lifetime of being obsessed with true crime, I’ve found that 99% of “unexplained deaths” or “unexplained mysteries” can be explained by police corruption. The other 1% is Mothman. @myfavoritemurder.bsky.social @lpontheleft.bsky.social #crimejunkie