The Daily Dread
@the-dailydread.bsky.social
America's second favorite satirical news source
Netflix Acquires WB Games, Becoming the Second Most Used N-Word by Gamers
December 20, 2025 at 10:39 PM
Netflix Acquires WB Games, Becoming the Second Most Used N-Word by Gamers
Trump Receives Nobel’s Coveted “Participation” Trophy
December 17, 2025 at 10:03 PM
Trump Receives Nobel’s Coveted “Participation” Trophy
Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene Resigns After Realizing She’s a Majorie Failure
December 14, 2025 at 12:06 AM
Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene Resigns After Realizing She’s a Majorie Failure
New Twitter Location Label Reveals Many Users Posting in a State of Delusion
December 13, 2025 at 12:18 AM
New Twitter Location Label Reveals Many Users Posting in a State of Delusion
Trump Copies Putin’s Peace Plan Homework but Forgets to Change the Name
December 11, 2025 at 1:11 AM
Trump Copies Putin’s Peace Plan Homework but Forgets to Change the Name
Average Reading Grade Level of Gen Z is Also 6-7
December 10, 2025 at 1:58 AM
Average Reading Grade Level of Gen Z is Also 6-7
Tomahawk Missile Obliterates Bathtub Toy Boat Over Drug Trafficking Suspicions
December 5, 2025 at 10:50 PM
Tomahawk Missile Obliterates Bathtub Toy Boat Over Drug Trafficking Suspicions
Therapist Dying to Tell You to Get a Better Haircut
December 4, 2025 at 3:11 PM
Therapist Dying to Tell You to Get a Better Haircut
ICE Agents Last Seen Pursuing Princess Leia and the Death Star Plans
December 3, 2025 at 9:04 PM
ICE Agents Last Seen Pursuing Princess Leia and the Death Star Plans
Stranger Things Season 5 Dangerously Close to Making Will an Interesting Character
December 2, 2025 at 6:37 PM
Stranger Things Season 5 Dangerously Close to Making Will an Interesting Character
People Complaining About Air Traffic Cuts Should Just Suck It Up and Use Their Private Jets Like the Rest of Us
December 1, 2025 at 1:59 AM
People Complaining About Air Traffic Cuts Should Just Suck It Up and Use Their Private Jets Like the Rest of Us
Kanye Hires Private Investigator to Find the Marbles He Lost
November 29, 2025 at 12:06 AM
Kanye Hires Private Investigator to Find the Marbles He Lost
Instead of the Politically Incorrect “Happy Thanksgiving!” Say “Gobble Gobble! Go Choke on a Mashed Potato!”
November 28, 2025 at 1:21 AM
Instead of the Politically Incorrect “Happy Thanksgiving!” Say “Gobble Gobble! Go Choke on a Mashed Potato!”
Most of US Government Budget Spent Treating Hand Cramps from Constantly Rewriting History
November 26, 2025 at 7:36 PM
Most of US Government Budget Spent Treating Hand Cramps from Constantly Rewriting History
After Madagascar Military Coup, When Asked When Public Elections Will Be, Military Simply Says, “I Like to Move It, Move It”
November 25, 2025 at 3:09 PM
After Madagascar Military Coup, When Asked When Public Elections Will Be, Military Simply Says, “I Like to Move It, Move It”
Local Police Force Loses Baking Competition Yet Again Due to a Few Bad Apples
November 20, 2025 at 11:04 PM
Local Police Force Loses Baking Competition Yet Again Due to a Few Bad Apples
Guys, I’m Starting to Think Some Rich People Aren’t That Great
November 19, 2025 at 1:43 AM
Guys, I’m Starting to Think Some Rich People Aren’t That Great
Researchers Discover That All Food is Grab & Go If You Dine and Dash
November 18, 2025 at 12:21 AM
Researchers Discover That All Food is Grab & Go If You Dine and Dash
Livestreamed Childbirth Closest Anyone on Twitch Has Come to Actual Labor
November 16, 2025 at 12:01 AM
Livestreamed Childbirth Closest Anyone on Twitch Has Come to Actual Labor
Madagascar Protests Interrupted by Four Penguins
November 14, 2025 at 12:08 AM
Madagascar Protests Interrupted by Four Penguins
For The Last Time, There’s No Such Thing as an Epstein File Reveal Cake, Please Stop Calling
November 13, 2025 at 1:45 AM
For The Last Time, There’s No Such Thing as an Epstein File Reveal Cake, Please Stop Calling
Man on Deathbed’s Only Regret is Not Doing More for the Shareholders
November 12, 2025 at 2:01 AM
Man on Deathbed’s Only Regret is Not Doing More for the Shareholders
Robot Replace Me? I’d Like to See a Robot Show Up Two Hours Late and Do a Mediocre Job
November 10, 2025 at 2:11 AM
Robot Replace Me? I’d Like to See a Robot Show Up Two Hours Late and Do a Mediocre Job
Heat Death of the Universe Delayed So the Devs Have a Bit More Time to Polish It
November 8, 2025 at 10:44 PM
Heat Death of the Universe Delayed So the Devs Have a Bit More Time to Polish It
Peruvian Citizens Starting to Question Political System of Exclusively Having Bribery Focused Presidents
November 7, 2025 at 12:02 AM
Peruvian Citizens Starting to Question Political System of Exclusively Having Bribery Focused Presidents