The Jonestown Jamboree
@thejonestownjamboree.neocities.org
Came back because I hate myself, but love (some of) you. Amateur shitposter. Scumbo leftist. LLM hater.
he/him.
https://jorts.horse/@thejonestownjamboree on mastodon
he/him.
https://jorts.horse/@thejonestownjamboree on mastodon
Xmas is spending multiple days at my in laws where my partner reverts to being a borderline suicidal teen shut-in, everyone eats all the time and as loudly as possible, everyone but me is massively passive aggressive, and I stare at the wall and pet the dog and hope this is not the year I snap.
December 24, 2025 at 9:04 PM
Xmas is spending multiple days at my in laws where my partner reverts to being a borderline suicidal teen shut-in, everyone eats all the time and as loudly as possible, everyone but me is massively passive aggressive, and I stare at the wall and pet the dog and hope this is not the year I snap.
I want hallucinogenic mushrooms that make you see lil' guys!
December 22, 2025 at 7:05 PM
I want hallucinogenic mushrooms that make you see lil' guys!
The #1 movie when you were 10 years old is how your 2026 is going to go.
Fuck yes Patrick Swayze. Dunno what that means for 2026 but fuck yeah Patrick Swayze.
Fuck yes Patrick Swayze. Dunno what that means for 2026 but fuck yeah Patrick Swayze.
December 19, 2025 at 10:17 PM
The #1 movie when you were 10 years old is how your 2026 is going to go.
Fuck yes Patrick Swayze. Dunno what that means for 2026 but fuck yeah Patrick Swayze.
Fuck yes Patrick Swayze. Dunno what that means for 2026 but fuck yeah Patrick Swayze.
So, does this mean no more drive-by "RELEASE THE EPSTEIN FILES!!!🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊" replies by blue MAGA?!
No?
Ok. *sigh*
No?
Ok. *sigh*
December 19, 2025 at 9:31 PM
So, does this mean no more drive-by "RELEASE THE EPSTEIN FILES!!!🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊" replies by blue MAGA?!
No?
Ok. *sigh*
No?
Ok. *sigh*
So that guy on reddit who ID'ed the Brown shooter the FBI couldn't figure out, they fuck him out of the reward money yet? lol
December 19, 2025 at 7:38 PM
So that guy on reddit who ID'ed the Brown shooter the FBI couldn't figure out, they fuck him out of the reward money yet? lol
I don't eat out much (money, food sucks; etc.) but I swear to all the gods if you go into a place where they assemble your food on demand and bust out a list of like 12 things because you were to lazy/stupid to call that big order in, I will help the poor line worker drown you in the frying oil vat.
December 19, 2025 at 7:32 PM
I don't eat out much (money, food sucks; etc.) but I swear to all the gods if you go into a place where they assemble your food on demand and bust out a list of like 12 things because you were to lazy/stupid to call that big order in, I will help the poor line worker drown you in the frying oil vat.
The thing that really gets me about Firefox embracing AI is, my hatred of AI aside, like, they're not going to "do it better". I can guarantee that people who use AI frequently are not going to switch over to their tools both out of familiarity but also because why would they?
December 19, 2025 at 1:45 PM
The thing that really gets me about Firefox embracing AI is, my hatred of AI aside, like, they're not going to "do it better". I can guarantee that people who use AI frequently are not going to switch over to their tools both out of familiarity but also because why would they?
"Sometimes if I'm good, Mommy will pop some jelly beans in her mouth before she puts "Bonzo to Bed", if you catch my drift. Gluck gluck!
*makes cock in the mouth hand gestures*"
-- Ronald Reagan, 40th Pres. of the USA to a middle school graduation
*makes cock in the mouth hand gestures*"
-- Ronald Reagan, 40th Pres. of the USA to a middle school graduation
December 17, 2025 at 8:29 PM
"Sometimes if I'm good, Mommy will pop some jelly beans in her mouth before she puts "Bonzo to Bed", if you catch my drift. Gluck gluck!
*makes cock in the mouth hand gestures*"
-- Ronald Reagan, 40th Pres. of the USA to a middle school graduation
*makes cock in the mouth hand gestures*"
-- Ronald Reagan, 40th Pres. of the USA to a middle school graduation
Fucking dipshit FBI up in here making it a goddamn pain in the ass to look up information on General Turtle, Inc.
December 17, 2025 at 5:16 PM
Fucking dipshit FBI up in here making it a goddamn pain in the ass to look up information on General Turtle, Inc.
Finding out hyena's loaf has made this dumpster fire of a day slightly less awful.
would boop the snoot/10
would boop the snoot/10
December 17, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Finding out hyena's loaf has made this dumpster fire of a day slightly less awful.
would boop the snoot/10
would boop the snoot/10
"I hate all the AI and enshitification with Windows/macOS/Firefox;etc. I JUST WANT SOMETHING ELSE."
"Here are some options"
"Ew, this is all nerd stuff with silly names. I'm not using any of this. You're gross. Go away gross stupid nerd."
lol, not serious people.
"Here are some options"
"Ew, this is all nerd stuff with silly names. I'm not using any of this. You're gross. Go away gross stupid nerd."
lol, not serious people.
December 17, 2025 at 1:20 PM
"I hate all the AI and enshitification with Windows/macOS/Firefox;etc. I JUST WANT SOMETHING ELSE."
"Here are some options"
"Ew, this is all nerd stuff with silly names. I'm not using any of this. You're gross. Go away gross stupid nerd."
lol, not serious people.
"Here are some options"
"Ew, this is all nerd stuff with silly names. I'm not using any of this. You're gross. Go away gross stupid nerd."
lol, not serious people.
Me: Literally every single person who wears a green hat I've ever interacted with in my entire life (over 40 years) has kicked me in the balls. Seems like green hatted guys have a problem.
A Green Hat Guy: Well, I'm not like that. I'm part of Green Hats for Peace. We're different.
A Green Hat Guy: Well, I'm not like that. I'm part of Green Hats for Peace. We're different.
December 16, 2025 at 8:38 PM
Me: Literally every single person who wears a green hat I've ever interacted with in my entire life (over 40 years) has kicked me in the balls. Seems like green hatted guys have a problem.
A Green Hat Guy: Well, I'm not like that. I'm part of Green Hats for Peace. We're different.
A Green Hat Guy: Well, I'm not like that. I'm part of Green Hats for Peace. We're different.
Anyone else using ublock to bypass the stupid fucking bluesky age verification stop working?
December 16, 2025 at 8:23 PM
Anyone else using ublock to bypass the stupid fucking bluesky age verification stop working?
One of my hot takes is that I think it's shitty for people to avoid putting their kids in their local public schools because "they're bad" and hide behind "well, i have to give my kid the best education!"
That's just "fuck you I got mine" of a different type.
That's just "fuck you I got mine" of a different type.
December 16, 2025 at 6:42 PM
One of my hot takes is that I think it's shitty for people to avoid putting their kids in their local public schools because "they're bad" and hide behind "well, i have to give my kid the best education!"
That's just "fuck you I got mine" of a different type.
That's just "fuck you I got mine" of a different type.
I don't think Malort tastes as horrific as it's hyped. Do not get me wrong, it's gross and I won't willingly drink it straight, but the descriptions of how it tastes are way worse than it actually is. It's a booze meme.
December 5, 2025 at 4:07 PM
I don't think Malort tastes as horrific as it's hyped. Do not get me wrong, it's gross and I won't willingly drink it straight, but the descriptions of how it tastes are way worse than it actually is. It's a booze meme.
Probably be pretty cool to be an earthworm. Just cruisin' thru dirt. Dirt goes in one end and gets pooped out the other with like, super minimal effort on your part. No eyes. No job. No worries. Just cruisin' and poopin' and getting them nutrients.
Nice.
Nice.
December 4, 2025 at 8:30 PM
Probably be pretty cool to be an earthworm. Just cruisin' thru dirt. Dirt goes in one end and gets pooped out the other with like, super minimal effort on your part. No eyes. No job. No worries. Just cruisin' and poopin' and getting them nutrients.
Nice.
Nice.
One of my firmly held religious beliefs is that there is an Achewood that can make fun of every single thing held dear by anyone at any point.
December 4, 2025 at 2:40 PM
One of my firmly held religious beliefs is that there is an Achewood that can make fun of every single thing held dear by anyone at any point.
Reposted by The Jonestown Jamboree
god, Sweet wrote so many songs that it would be fun to do cinematic crimes to
December 4, 2025 at 3:39 AM
god, Sweet wrote so many songs that it would be fun to do cinematic crimes to
Johnny Dangerously is a Christmas movie.
Romancing the Stone is a Christmas movie.
Xanadu is a Christmas movie.
The Toxic Avenger? You bet your ass it's a Christmas movie.
Romancing the Stone is a Christmas movie.
Xanadu is a Christmas movie.
The Toxic Avenger? You bet your ass it's a Christmas movie.
December 2, 2025 at 4:10 PM
Johnny Dangerously is a Christmas movie.
Romancing the Stone is a Christmas movie.
Xanadu is a Christmas movie.
The Toxic Avenger? You bet your ass it's a Christmas movie.
Romancing the Stone is a Christmas movie.
Xanadu is a Christmas movie.
The Toxic Avenger? You bet your ass it's a Christmas movie.
David Bowie
They Might Be Giants
Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers
Amythyst Kiah
(barf) Marylin Manson*
*I was a stupid edgelord teenager during his peak is my excuse
They Might Be Giants
Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers
Amythyst Kiah
(barf) Marylin Manson*
*I was a stupid edgelord teenager during his peak is my excuse
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve been to:
Nine Inch Nails
Godspeed You Black Emperor
Front 242
The Young Gods
Laibach
Nine Inch Nails
Godspeed You Black Emperor
Front 242
The Young Gods
Laibach
judas priest
tsol
wire (3 times)
bob log III (twice)
helmet
and a bunch of local 00's portland bands lol
tsol
wire (3 times)
bob log III (twice)
helmet
and a bunch of local 00's portland bands lol
November 27, 2025 at 8:19 PM
David Bowie
They Might Be Giants
Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers
Amythyst Kiah
(barf) Marylin Manson*
*I was a stupid edgelord teenager during his peak is my excuse
They Might Be Giants
Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers
Amythyst Kiah
(barf) Marylin Manson*
*I was a stupid edgelord teenager during his peak is my excuse
For the record, I hate this fucking shithole country. I hate the bullshit love of it's horrific settler past. I hate it's record of doing the most inhumane things to other human beings for stupid reasons and continuing to do so up to this very day. I hate it's patriotism and it's fake myth bullshit.
November 24, 2025 at 10:30 PM
For the record, I hate this fucking shithole country. I hate the bullshit love of it's horrific settler past. I hate it's record of doing the most inhumane things to other human beings for stupid reasons and continuing to do so up to this very day. I hate it's patriotism and it's fake myth bullshit.
Oh yah, it's "I have no taste, so I'm going to slag on turkey day food" season online.
"But turkey is not good!" Let me stop you there. That's a skill issue.
"Green bean casserole is gross." I hope you one day get revenge on whoever hurt you.
"But turkey is not good!" Let me stop you there. That's a skill issue.
"Green bean casserole is gross." I hope you one day get revenge on whoever hurt you.
November 24, 2025 at 6:45 PM
Oh yah, it's "I have no taste, so I'm going to slag on turkey day food" season online.
"But turkey is not good!" Let me stop you there. That's a skill issue.
"Green bean casserole is gross." I hope you one day get revenge on whoever hurt you.
"But turkey is not good!" Let me stop you there. That's a skill issue.
"Green bean casserole is gross." I hope you one day get revenge on whoever hurt you.
AHEM!
*slides into the conversation*
I believe, you will find the correct term is "hanged".
😏😏🌊🌊✊✊
*slides into the conversation*
I believe, you will find the correct term is "hanged".
😏😏🌊🌊✊✊
November 20, 2025 at 6:31 PM
AHEM!
*slides into the conversation*
I believe, you will find the correct term is "hanged".
😏😏🌊🌊✊✊
*slides into the conversation*
I believe, you will find the correct term is "hanged".
😏😏🌊🌊✊✊
One of the best things about the internet is that you can say "this subgroup has a lot of racists in it" and be factually true and in minutes there will be a dozen white guys saying "hold on now pal, I'm part of that subgroup and I don't see that at all!".
November 19, 2025 at 5:20 PM
One of the best things about the internet is that you can say "this subgroup has a lot of racists in it" and be factually true and in minutes there will be a dozen white guys saying "hold on now pal, I'm part of that subgroup and I don't see that at all!".